Today, I asked my husband why he won't list me as his wife on Facebook. Apparently, it's because he doesn't want the high school friends he just reconnected with to know that he married "the biggest geek in the whole school." We went to the same high school. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML
Today, I married the love of my life, which was meant to stay secret until we can afford a ceremony. I opened Facebook to see that my hubby’s mom made a post about it, called me her new daughter-in-law, and tagged me. All 3 things we specifically asked her not to do. FML
Today, I was meeting my husband's old friends at his 20 year high school reunion. He introduced me as his 'friend from work' to his ex girlfriend. FML
Today, I got a call from an ex, demanding to know why my Facebook relationship status was set as married. I got married a few months ago, and I quietly explained this to her. My wife overheard and now thinks I've been cheating all along. FML
Today, I got a Facebook message from the school genius/nerd, who I have never talked to. He politely informed me that after much thought and deliberation, he has narrowed it down to who his ideal mate is. Me. FML
Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML
Today, I found out my husband has a fake Facebook account that he uses to add guys and live a double life as some kind of "gamer chick". This would be disturbing enough, even if he hadn't used pictures of me to give a face to his alter ego. FML
Today, I ran into an old high school friend while out with my husband. When she inquired who I was married to, I pointed to my husband, who was looking at shirts. She laughed and said, "No really?", insinuating that I couldn't get anyone that good looking. FML
Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML
Today, I found out that my husband keeps in contact with the woman he was infatuated with in high school. He texts her more than he texts me. FML
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Top comments
Calaura9 0
Your husband is imature and cares more about appearances than your feelings. Deny him sex and anything else he may like until he changes this.
mynameisjohn19 0
Wow what a jerk. He obviously hasn't matured enough if he's still seeking approval from everyone who went to your high school.
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Comments (135)
Smardel 0
Wow! WTH! Thats really stupid of him.
HahaYDI 0
He doesn't have to tell anyone about you, just go make some waffles for him.
z3r0ram 0
it's not his fault you sucked at being cool
NEWTROLLINTOWN 0
YDI FOR EATING
lollipops321 0
... people like you are truly moronic.
HahaYDI 0
Your parents are cousins, number 55.
Antivirus_fml 0
Who cares? its just facebook. :/
NEWTROLLINTOWN 0
PEOPLE LIKE YOU SUCK MY BALLS
Saddrew 0
No it makes perfect scence the OP deserves it for being a nerd
natepyron 0
this wouldn't make any sense if you didn't go to the same school. by telling us that you went to the same school ruins because they know youvwere a geek....
DishHeads 9
ydi for marrying the dumbest jock in the whole school
skullcandifiedDJ 5
That means OP's husband was a desperate little loser to marry the "biggest geek" in the school.
KtKD54 2
At least it didnt turn out that he was the biggest geek there. Did it?
neonokku 0
Omg that sucks!!! He doesn't deserve you
mike1921 0
Everytime I see someone say "he/she doesn't deserve you" on FML , a puppy dies
Oblong 2
Burn your eyes out :)
deja54 0
Seriously. I'm sick of seeing the "he/she doesn't deserve" bullshit. It's stupid. It doesn't make anyone feel better. It's patronizing, and more importantly, it's always used in the most inappropriate places. "My boyfriend broke up with me" "He didn't deserve you anyway!" "What? Why? Because he didn't want to be with her? Logic fail."
mike1921 0
Besides that, WE DON'T KNOW THE OP. For all we know the OP is a total bitch and deserves someone like her husband. Or, atleast, the way her husband appears from the FML.
Calaura9 0
Your husband is imature and cares more about appearances than your feelings. Deny him sex and anything else he may like until he changes this.
deja54 0
Yeah. That won't strain the relationship at all...
annamg 0
Yeah, because using sex as a bargaining chip is really going to help and strengthen a relationship.
Marrach 7
Immature*. The word was immature.
Skoff_fml 27
#47 aye, and pretending you're not married to your wife isn't going to help either. :p
mynameisjohn19 0
Wow what a jerk. He obviously hasn't matured enough if he's still seeking approval from everyone who went to your high school.
missmarley93 1
haha agreed! what an asshole!
mahree8mellos 0
#4 and #10, ftw.
sweetSandy 0
i agree..
ntherewas1 11
Nicely said. Makes me wonder about his personality, obviously he saw through your perceived geekiness to fall in love with you now, but the fact remains that he's totally uncomfortable with anyone else thinking he got you. So he's shallow and insecure really.
anuskina 0
what is he, 16?
alexgisforme3 0
what a d!ck
FaithX 0
Sounds like you may need to check out divorce lawyers.
Thecommish 0
Relationships are not a one way deal. Both sides make a choice. You choose to marry a total ass - what do you expect? Maybe he played all smooth with you while dating - but that's a two way deal too. Obviously you made a bad choice - now kick his ass to the curb.
mike1921 0
Over facebook?
Puolukka 4
I would just go on facebook and leave posts all over his wall signed with "Your loving wife" :p
aback 5
Change from "biggest geek" to "most vindictive bitch" and take his silly ass to the cleaners.
theta_fml 0
Tell him you're glad no one knows that you married the biggest jerk in the whole school.
judgeymcjudge 0
^^ THIS.