Today, I'm recovering from my second back surgery. I survived four years in the Army with one combat tour without major injury, only to destroy my back the day after discharge by lifting my mother-in-law's suitcase into the trunk of her car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I couldn't sleep and in the process of tossing and turning I did something very painful to my back. I spent 4 years in the marine corps infantry, but laying in a bed kicks my ass. FML
MVP
Today, during my second shift back at work after missing four weeks for knee surgery, I stabbed myself in the hand and now need three weeks off for that surgery. Just as I'm up for a promotion. FML
Today, I fell and fractured my tailbone. I just healed from my last tailbone fracture 4 weeks ago. FML
Spring break
Today, I'm off work for 4 weeks after trying to move an obese patient from their bed. The poor woman was so large that when we tried to move her the leg of the bed snapped, and her weight drove the sharp broken leg down through my foot into the carpet. Surgery and no walking for 4 weeks. Whoopee. FML
Today, I had surgery on my arm. My mom has recently had the same surgery, and my dad is having his first rib removed and won't be able to move his arm. My family combined now has three functioning arms. FML
Never joke about it
Today, I got back to work from a 4 month hospital stay and I joked with my boss that after so long away, I’m not planning on being sick again for years. Two hours later, a coworker knocked me down the stairs. A dislocated hip and a broken femur requiring 4-6 weeks of recovery. FML
Enjoy yourself
Today, I woke up after a 16-hour shift, and my back is out. I worked it in order to "enjoy" my 2 days off. I can barely move. FML
Littered
Today, I'm on crutches and wearing an orthopedic boot because a 22.5 pound box of cat litter fell out of my back hatch onto my foot. FML
Cut short
Today, after working two jobs and saving constantly this year all for a month-long solo vacation traveling to 7 countries, I arrived in first one. Within three hours I fell and broke my foot, forcing me to come home in fear of needing surgery. FML
Stranded
Today, I tore a muscle in my back. At the hospital, I was prescribed some pain medication. My husband got me settled at home, with everything I needed within reach, and left for work. As I picked up the bottle to take the first pill, I knocked it on the floor. It rolled under the couch. FML
Top comments
urbanbigfoot 20
A+ for creativity. Made me giggle.
cableguy818 3
Thank you for your service. I am sorry to hear about your back. Good luck my friend
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Comments (20)
dietcoke09 25
I never served my country but I have sprained my back picking up a textbook at the old age of 20. It happens. Be more careful. Use your knees lol
SekTr 9
use your buttocks! not the knees
Tripartita 45
"He's spent years training, survived a combat tour unharmed, and you want to trust an outside party to take him down?" "I'm quite confident she's the woman for the job. She… has incentives of her own." "What the **** does that even mean?" "She's his /mother in law/."
urbanbigfoot 20
A+ for creativity. Made me giggle.
AverageDayGamer 8
It could have been the straw that broke the camels back.... pun intended. Thank you for your service, sir.
maharb01 17
My father once threw his back out leaning over to spit toothpaste into the sink. At least since you're discharged, you might get something other than 800 mg Motrin and Flexeril for treatment.
joeyl1990 28
See that's why you're supposed to lift with your back in a jerking twisting motion
caliguy08 17
That's how it always happens brother. 10 1/2 years in and a tour in the Middle East with no injuries, only for me to get injured my 2nd week back in a training exercise... where I was the instructor.
latenerd 11
Sorry, OP, that sucks. On the plus side.... at least you have great mother-in-law joke material for the rest of your life?
monyluv1 13
Messed my back up by having sex. I mean wtf??? So bad I had to have back surgery last year!! Worth it? Hell yeah
naturegrl 9
That is really really unfortunate. And ironic.
TomNap 5
That's not uncommon with back injuries. They can take on little strains and tears that have no effect until one final push brings the whole shebang down.