Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I wore noise-canceling headphones while cleaning my apartment. Apparently I'd been singing at the top of my lungs for nearly an hour, because my neighbor knocked on my door just to ask if everything was OK. FML
Today, my neighbor had a word with me for being "loud in the bedroom" last night. I haven't had any action for two years now, but I was too happy that she thought I'd got lucky to tell her the truth. So what was I really doing last night? Trying to sing like Christina Aguilera. FML
Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
Today, I was alone in the kitchen doing the dishes, and I started singing along to my favorite song when it came on my playlist. However, unbeknownst to me, my neighbors were having a barbecue next door, and they cheered and applauded when I'd finished. I’m never singing again. FML
Today, I came back to my dorm only to hear my neighbor having loud sex. I thought I was just thinking when I said, "At least do it against the other wall," but when I was left later on, he walked by, apologized and said that he thought I wasn't home, and promised to be more quiet next time. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Today, I finally had some alone time to relax and watch a movie. As soon as I pressed play, my neighbor started blasting their music so loud I could feel the bass in my chest. I tried calling the landlord, but they didn't answer. I ended up watching the movie with subtitles while listening to my neighbor's music. FML
Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML
Today, I was home alone, blasting music, dancing in my underwear, singing into a wooden spoon. I turned around mid-performance to see my landlord standing in the kitchen. I’d forgotten about the maintenance appointment I'd scheduled. FML
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Top comments
afdude87 6
haha wonder how long you've lived there...
Ranimal 12
What gave you the idea that it was sound proof? The lack of complaints? Maybe the yawn was a sign that you need to spice up the vibrator show, just saying.
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Comments (117)
ZingDooper 0
Lame? I don't get it... not much of an FML
Hide_Yo_Kids 0
the OPs "soundproof" apartment obviously dsnt work since he can hear a neighbor yawning
afdude87 6
haha wonder how long you've lived there...
boyguydudemalema 0
prolly 2 days since she didn't notice it the nights b4, or that was one hell of a yawn.
dudeitsdanny 10
^ So from the ipod touch, the "More FMLs" overlap onto your comment, and it looks like you said "yawnwhich" It made me think of "yawnwich"... I don't know where I'm going with this anymore.. But i'm not stoned.
AmeenWhoElse 0
Thats cuz he prolly wasnt next door he snuck in to watch her use the vibrator
zakkyzebra 11
45, dude why not XD
Kingdutch 3
45, I think you're looking for sandwich! :D
pvthill 0
I hope ur a girl op using vibrator
BWill9014 4
78 you see there is this thing called a gender icon which FML provides for us at the top of the FML... you should look at those maybe
leishababyx 0
Hahahahahha :L OMG !
jackieeoo 0
hottttttiee up there^
13Lina97 0
desperate up there^
TallMist 32
#78 Why do you care if they were female or not anyways? There are guys that enjoy that.
cassey419 0
so much for sound proof
IronZombie 0
ur neighbor probably enjoyed it op. unless your fat..
zebramebra926 0
haha have fun next time you see your neighbor
imcutefml 0
i wish i lived next door
cassey419 0
creepy
GTmustang07 0
You wish you were next door listening to a girl using a vibrator? dude you need to get laid.
bh0p 0
So does OPa
TwitchingNebula 17
You are a **** for taking your picture like that.
muchagente 5
you can't blame him for getting bored if you stay silent for the night.
pvthill 0
8 win
Alanah101 0
Lol. I second that #8.
meegsiiee 5
You ledgend #8 :D
dingle1673 0
I dont get it...
poptart840 5
It's cause your a dingle.
Keithgsxr 0
lmao
Ranimal 12
What gave you the idea that it was sound proof? The lack of complaints? Maybe the yawn was a sign that you need to spice up the vibrator show, just saying.
lane73 0
agreed
knibbsy 4
YDI for putting on a horrible performance. If you could sing, make semi-interesting conversation, and not sound like a zombie in menopause while diddling yourself, you would have heard *fapfapfapfap* instead of a yawn.
glitterypink 0
haha. Well said
Buchitoo 4
Lmao!!! I wonder how a zombie in menopause would sound!!!!!
xX_LilSammie_Xx 4
LOL
stephyhull 4
haha this made my day :'))
poppyseed420 9
mine too :)
Kolden 11
hilarious
Princessdani16 0
Lmao you sir are hilarious!!
svar91 0
lol laughed so hard at this