Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I spent a full hour working on my British accent. FML
Today, my mom mentioned how she loves a certain actor's "British" accent. I couldn't help but mention that there's no such thing, and that there are lots of different accents in Britain. She got pissed and lectured me for "lying" to her and trying to make her feel stupid. FML
Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he was saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML
Today, my best friend and I went to the movies. There was a hot cashier, so I thought it would be cool to talk in a British accent to try and be sexy. I walked up and started talking when he interrupted me and said in a very heavy British accent, "I know you're faking. You can stop now." FML
Today, while my hometown mayor becomes a world-famous crackhead and douche-bag, here in the UK it has come to this: when people hear my accent and ask me if I'm American, it's less embarrassing just to say, "Yeah", rather than admit I'm Canadian. FML
Today, at work, I was helping someone who really sounded like she had a Boston accent. So, I asked her where she was from. She has never been out of state. Turns out she has a speech impediment. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
Today, two American guys attacked me for not speaking their language. I'm from England, and they said I'm speaking my own language wrong. FML
Today, I went through a fast-food drive-thru and gave my order in a perfect British accent for fun. When I got to the window, the cashier handed me my food and said, "I love your accent!" Caught off guard, I replied, "Oh, thanks a lot!" in my normal New Jersey accent. The confusion on her face was priceless. FML
Today, my mom thought it would be a good idea for me to talk with a British accent during my job interview to make me sound smarter. I'm applying for a job at McDonald's. FML
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Top comments
Keevarou 17
Tsk tsk, some people, just tell them straight that you are indeed British and such. Not your fault that you talk the way you do, some people like to notice the smallest things. I hope you are not self conscious about the way you talk.. Good thing it was not worse though, they could have commented the way you walk or something Or the way you breathe
BFons 19
What a wanker.
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Comments (142)
Trix_Disorder 20
Everyone has an accent to people from other countries, or even regions.
zombieslayer83 19
#15, I'm not sure why, but I can't stop laughing! You did a beautiful thing there! Thank you, it made my day.
ColbyGB 13
Well that's just bloody wrung
redhedsaysrawr 18
I'm quite certain I've seen this same FML before...
jcrb 11
pip pip, cheerio ole chap!
perdix 31
Go with the outrageous fake French accent. If everyone thinks you are a fraud, you might as well be a sexy fraud.
outoftown 27
Have you been watching too much BBC America? Or Downton Abbey?
SmosherMe 6
Doctor Who...
grumpybr 13
I've learned to embrace my accent once I figured I'd never be able to get rid of it. I was born and raised in Brazil, and learned english in my late teens. Funny how people from your own place of birth can't recognize the authenticity of yours though.
HomoIndomitus 4
Practice till you sound native.
TheChelseaSays 34
He is native. No practice needed.
supportcommand 17
Slap them with some corned beef and tell them to piss off! Then go enjoy some bangers and hash!