Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I realized I've become a stereotypical militant vegan when I told a friend that we should start raising Lone Star ticks and dropping them around town so we could spread meat allergies and force people to eat vegan. FML
Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML
Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
Today, I bought a jacket with real fur on it. Turns out, i'm allergic and now my ears look like they have herpes on them. FML
Today, my mom called me to the laundry room after she saw a dead animal in there. I took a look and agreed we should call animal control. After ten minutes of freaking out, they finally arrived to confirm that the dead animal was the hood to my winter jacket. FML
Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML
Today, my boss was hosting some client representatives for a meeting and had offered to buy everyone lunch. The "healthy" place he's ordering from made me sick last time, so I'd politely opted out. At lunch, the reps glared at me in the meeting room as I ate my homemade chili con carne. Turns out they're all vegans. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
KeithHarris 0
Serves you right for wearing fake animals. Next time wear the real thing so you'll at least deserve getting pelted with fake animal blood. :-D PETA members are dicks.
michellaneous 0
whats with the red liquids lately? well, PETA is a bit extreme, but they shouldn't be going around bombarding people with red liquids!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (510)
TheBigCasino 0
I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. You left off idiot.
KEVINPASH 0
PETA can suck my balls hahaha
UltimateIdiot911 0
I support PETA. Please Eat Tasty Animal. But seriously, PETA are full of idiots and psychos. I propose we train attack dogs to attack PETA members. It's a win. They get maul and can't fight back otherwise it goes against their cult like belief.
yooper10 0
Seems to me that if I was against the wearing of fur, I wouldn't wear something that looked like fur. It's supporting the fashion, which ultimately leads to more fur being put on clothing. I agree with everyone, PETA is obnoxiously extreme.
le_lauren 0
Just so you all know, it's not PETA who is psychotic. It's ALF. You were probably attacked by ALF members. Those are the activists that are known to throw red liquid on people wearing fur. PETA members are actually much more civilized with their attempts at convincing people to go Vegan/Veggie.
ZuRG_fml 7
bash: "it's fake fur, you dumb bitch!" "that's okay, it's fake blood"
DankJemo 0
I hate PETA, and wouldn't have hesitated to break their god damned faces wide open... If I were in that situation, at least. I don't wear fur, never will... But, if someone threw red liquid at me they'd better be sure they can run faster than I can.
UberSara 0
Yet more proof that PETA and the vast majority of it's members are nothing short of mentally and socially inept.
wallythedolly 0
PETA has the worst way of going about their cause. Take them to a small claims court!
A7X5989 0
mmmm cheeseburger!