Today, driving home, my girlfriend and I decided we were finally going to have sex. We got in the backseat, then I opened my condom to find it was already broken. We ended up playing connect four instead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex in his car. He got out of the car and moved to the passenger seat with me. As he shut the door, it slammed against my fingers, breaking one of them. He then asked if we could still have sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had the house to ourselves. We started getting a little frisky when we discovered we were out of condoms. After a quick run to the store, we found ourselves locked out of the house. Now we have condoms, but no way to use them. FML
Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have a quickie in the car. We had left a window open so it wasn't too hot, and I was holding onto the edge of the window, fingers hanging over. In the midst of it all, my boyfriend managed to close the window by hitting the button. My finger is broken. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate, and I gave her a condom to put on me. She tried to open it with her teeth, but ripped it. That was my only condom. I'm now sitting here watching a soap opera with a boner. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a good time. Perfect. Afterwards, he stupidly tried to pull the condom off with way too much force. It burst everywhere, splattering our faces, the bed sheets, and even the wall. Absolute disaster. We just stared at each other and laughed. Never again. FML
Today, I drove my girlfriend home around 11pm to her garage where we started to have sex. When she came to climax she slipped and hit her head. Her parents heard the crash and came down; we were both still naked, and she was unconscious. FML
Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend while my parents were out. After they got home, my dog brought out our used condom. FML
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Top comments
littlegolferboy 4
So your first time together was going to be in the back of your car. That's so classy. You probably had a top hat and monocle on at the time, didn't you?
perdix 31
Connect Four? Is that where you do 69 and finger each other's assholes? That's four connections, right? A bit awkward and not to my liking, but a pretty fair alternative to screwing.
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Comments (93)
ReecesPieces 0
Lol at 9, 10, 11, and 12 and an abortion might cost too much.
Jimbo2000 0
Oh wow, you didn't get laid. So what
betterthingstodo 0
Wtf? That's awesome! Connect four is the shit! The real fml'd be if you'd been planning on playing connect four in the backseat but then it broke and you had to have sex. Now that'd be a bummer, especially if you bummed her.
Ninjaface 0
That must of been a HOT game of Connect Four.
BellaMuerte_fml 0
Connect Four? Weaksauce. You should've played Hi-Ho Cherry O's!
rraaee 0
I know how that it. :/
toaster468 0
why, cause you never get action?
anonacs 0
Why didn't you just continue driving home? Or drive to a convenience store and buy another one?
Austinsnyder601 1
You don't have to have a condom to make out, ******* noob, just go buy one, or make out and rub each other?
FoundManyLemons 0
Yeah, why didn't you just go out and buy more? They're not hard to find....
Piquan 0
I'm sorry to hear that it was broken, but it's a good thing you noticed, and good for you for stopping! LOTS of accidental pregnancies or STDs are from improperly used or stored condoms. You didn't say where you had stored it. Don't store your condoms in your car or your wallet; the heat makes them weak, and likely to break. If you're lucky, it'll break before you start using it and you have a chance to notice. If not... well, just be careful where you store them.