Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I assisted a customer at work. She was asking me all sorts of stupid questions and acting like an entitled, spoiled brat. When she left, since I had a mask on, I meant to mouth, "Stupid bitch" but I blurted it out loud. Everyone heard. I was fired. FML
Today, I learned the hard way how easy it is to get on my boss's bad side. We were talking about reality TV shows and I'd mentioned how much I despise Snooki, and how useless to the planet she is. Now I fear for my job. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life." I'm 26 and just very short. FML
Today, while at work, a customer refused to speak louder, despite me asking her to do it several times. As a result, I took her order incorrectly. The customer then finally decided to raise her voice, but only to yell at me about my poor listening skills. FML
Today, my English teacher kicked me out of class for being "rude and disruptive." In actuality, I had called her out for having blatantly used Google Translate for several example sentences, all of which sounded as if a semi-literate foreigner had constructed them. FML
Today, I was met with a flurry of complaints after my “disgusting” speech during my child’s career day at school. I’m a labor and delivery nurse, and my use of words like “fetus, breast, cesarean, etc.” was too much for the kids. I never even mentioned sex or genitals, and they’re in the 6th grade. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I was working at Old Navy. A girl came up to me and did a bizarre dance. Not knowing how to react, I imitated her to be friendly with the customer. Then she stopped cold. Her friend stormed up to me and yelled, "You jerk! Why are you making fun of her? She has Tourette's, you know!" FML
Today, my boss bitched me out on the sales floor for a good 10 minutes, because I wasn't "smiling the right way" for our customers. FML
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Top comments
Death_Hoe_Inn 10
My god, it's breeding
fylx100 19
I've lost all hope for humanity...
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Comments (376)
superfail77 8
RIP faith in humanity Killed at the hands of New Jersey
Mahtari 19
I couldn't do your job. I'd have killed it.
Zackly 4
I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
spotthefuckup 2
I don't wonder why she's pregnant at a young age then..poor child she's carrying.
TheGothGamerGirl 20
They are obviously a rare breed of the bloated orange idiotic ****. Which birth rate is increasing rapidly for these rare creatures.
SamanthaCassieL 10
*hits head off wall* I don't know where to begin..
cjsport13 5
South park knows what to do
XxskyelovexX 13
" Snooki wanna smoosh smoosh" HOLY SHIT! *pulls out gun*
Tanner1245 4
sorry about my generation, it kinda sucks. not all of us are bad like that though. I hate it when people say swag or yolo it dosn't make you cool it makes you an idiot who is trying to fit in with everyone else and telling people what everyone knows: you only live once just so you can go do stupid shit and try and have an excuse for it. i think its dumb and people should stop with that crap. sorry OP that chick made your job a lot harder
Tanner1245 4
I used swag and yolo as an excuse because that's what most people do use.
darthzerg 7
America is ******. I hate my life. Thats all i have to say to avoid a rant.