Today, at my job in a cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like yours. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I yelled at a new employee for violating the company's makeup policy which is minimum coverage. She had red lipstick, very dark drawn eyebrows, and foundation that made her look like a ghost. She took out a makeup wipe and used it then showed me it, only to reveal she doesn't wear any. FML
Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML
Today, my friend and I decided to wear a new red lipstick. The guy I like turned around, looked at her and said, "Red is a really interesting, sexy color. Pretty bold. Not bad." and he smiled. I waited, smiling also, only for him frown and say, "Your teeth are REALLY yellow." FML
Today, my boss commented on the fact that I don't usually wear makeup, then told me it would be much appreciated if I'd change that. FML
Today, I was at a party with a few of my friends. We saw a guy walking around with bright pink lipstick all over his mouth, so we made a bet to see who could match the lipstick to the girl first. I won. It was my girlfriend's. FML
Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous coworker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added that the color was fitting perfectly with my acne. I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML
Today, I bought some makeup supplies at the supermarket. The cashier snorted and muttered, "Not enough in the world for you." FML
Today, at work, an old lady dropped her lipstick into the ladies' room toilet, which is out of order and won't flush. I had to reach in and pull it out amid human waste. She thanked me, then uncapped it, and put some on her lips. FML
Today, I was working my job at Sephora when I overheard two women talking. One of them asked her friend, "Is being pretty a requirement to work here?" Her friend turned to see me, turned back to her friend and said, "I guess not." FML
Today, at the store, I didn't hear the cashier when she asked if I had a loyalty card. She took one look at my naturally bitchy-looking face and muttered "It's my JOB to ask, jeez." FML
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Top comments
iggz 0
"Trust me, you don't need any help in that department!"
DFlit1 0
Verbal bitch slap!!!
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Comments (102)
scruffy_janitor5 1
What a bitch
supimnyancat 9
Did you tell her what lipstick you were using?
ajmacrae 5
So what colour means "I'm a bitch"?
Enslaved 38
You'll know the colour when you see it. (I'm guessing a bright red. (: It's just like when you see a girl in "**** me" high heels. You just know the meaning behind the outfit.
You_Need_Soap 6
**** red
alival 12
She sounds like the bitch!
Ann23 7
You can't pick your customers. Wether she meant it offensively or not you just gotta be the bigger person and don't let it ruin your day!
weetmaster 6
Hey hey hey, there is nothing wrong with female dogs!!!
pokeychris 6
Obviously you're a bitch.
BellaBoo8275 1
And obviously, you're a dick
emag_eht 18
It does depend on her tone. If she was just joking around I wouldn't take it personally. And even if she meant it in a malicious way she's the idiot who wants to look like a bitch. Let her look like what she is.
joemartin4214 4
I'm sure she didn't mean it in a derogatory way. Maybe she was just jealous of how great you look with your lipstick! :)
ms_YoungMula 8
" well ma'am I feel like this one suits you better, it's says I'm dirty *****!"