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noantiquesforme Santa Clara, United States

Today, an old man walked up to me, said, "Hey missy, you wanna see an antique?" and winked. FML

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Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Same thing different taste

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Top comments

If that's the line he's going with, it's probably never been used. Truly a vintage antique!

19990231 29

That pickup line is probably as old as he is.

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Comments (81)

LostInTheZone11 29

Lousey pick up line #7723085-KTRA.

Time to break out the special shampoo, apparently.

So what did you say/do

Better keep it in a museum :D

RusticChick 27

Clever... yet, disturbing.

As horribly disturbing and rapey as it is, it's kind of clever. Probably should have been saved for his wife, rather than a stranger.

crimsonlilies 26

Good point, however can't help but to wonder if this pickup line is preventing him from having a wife.

JustinJK 21

Maybe his wife is dead and he's lonely

I hope you're not excusing his behavior 53. There's no reason for him to talk some random stranger like that.

Oh god. Reminds me of the time when I engaged in a conversation with an old man about Christianity and his wife & ended with him telling me that he "would pleasure me with his tongue if (I) was a few years older." I completely understand. I thought I was being followed the entire way home. FYL indeed. *shudders*

My God, I think that would scar me for life.

that's nasty OP but I'm deff gna use that line when I'm an antique myself.

you might not be interested, but let's see what hardcore pawn has to say about his antique.

Hahahaha, that's actually really clever.

ViviMage 40

It's like a Christmas tree at that age: all dried out and balls are there for decoration.