Today, an old lady savagely shoved me out of a queue, after I'd been waiting for twenty minutes. I couldn't bring myself to fight back or say anything, and ended up dragging my sorry arse to the back of the queue. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while queuing in a shop, a girl appeared to bunk the line. When I asked her about it, she said it was nothing to do with me. She then asked me what was I going to do about it, before kneeing me in the nuts. I was overtaken by everyone in the queue. FML
Today, I was yelled at by a bunch of angry people because I couldn't physically move out of the way while 10 more tried to force their way onto a subway in Shanghai. Then one old lady started hitting me with her purse to get me to move even more. FML
Today, I was standing in a queue when an old lady turned, looked straight at me, and asked me to hold her bag. Confused, I took a hold of it. She started screaming for help claiming I was stealing her shopping. Turns out, she was talking to her husband behind me. FML
Today, I went to an over-crowded grocery store. As I reached the front of a long line, I noticed that a cart had been abandoned in everybody's way. Trying to be helpful, I moved it to the side. An enormous woman then shoved me and yelled at me for "pushing her property around." FML
Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML
Today, I was on the train next to an elderly woman. When I told her it was my stop, she turned her knees towards the aisle, and I, thinking that she was letting me go by, began to edge past. She screamed, "DON'T PUSH ME!" and the whole train turned to look. I was thus the asshole pushing the old lady. FML
Today, the slow, incompetent kitchen staff was keeping customers waiting for their food for 20 minutes. I got sick of a bunch of grown adults with kids my age ganging up on me, so I quit on the spot, and walked. Some guy grabbed me by the collar and dragged me back to the register. People cheered. FML
Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, I was taking a walk, when an elderly lady in a motorized wheelchair slammed into me from behind. There was plenty of room to pass by, but noooo, trying to run me down like a dog, then giving me the finger and yelling "Watch where you're walking!" is so damn preferable. FML
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Top comments
The_DoritoNinja 4
Take a stand. People like that will continue to think they are the boss of everything if you don't defy them.
Cynical_in_SK 6
Old people are scary man!
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Comments (107)
EffYoLife 14
You should have slapped that old bytch. She should be old enough to know better!
LennyComa 39
Shove the old bint back...harsh but fair.
linkinpark98 24
Watch out! Granny would cut a bitch.
wittygirl 8
Old people aren't the sweet kind people we've been mislead to believe. They're cantankerous do watch your step or else granny's gonna swat you with her can!
wittygirl 8
Old people aren't the sweet kind people we've been mislead to believe. They're cantankerous do watch your step or else granny's gonna swat you with her can!
icallbullshit 3
Pussy. People are becoming softer and softer these days all because 'they don't want to cause a scene'
goddamniluvme 0
Well, she's old I guess I'd let her cut too. But I sure as hell would of been right behind her, mentioning how my grandmother had manners and acted like a person, not a pig forcing its way into the feeding line. While smiling OF COURSE! :)
wdd2 5
I cant quite remember which one, but this reminds me of a bit by a comedian, once you hit 90 you should be able to legally steal ANYTHING, if an old lady takes something from you, you didnt own it in the first place.
Maht_fml 0
You british people use a funny word for a line.
Seeingdouble 10
British old ladies have a thirst for battle.