Today, after getting off work from a horrible 16 hour shift, I went out to my truck. My windows were completely covered in window chalk, to the point that I couldn't leave. I had to spend the next hour and a half washing it all off while my manager laughed about it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the mall with a couple of friends. While walking through the parking lot, we saw a very dirty car. You couldn't even see the inside of the car through the windows. I thought it would be funny to trace on the window, "Wash Me." After doing so, the driver got out of the car. FML
Today, a co-worker called in sick due to a family emergency. I ended up working an unplanned 12-hour overnight shift. After I clocked out, I dragged myself out to the parking lot to go home. Someone had smeared tacos all over my car. FML
Today, I went to get my car washed at one of those places where you can watch through the glass. I watched in horror, face pressed against the glass, as my car went through with the window down. FML
Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML
Today, I noticed that someone smeared "wash me" into the grime of my car. I decided to take it to get a wash. I pulled up, put my vehicle in neutral, and kicked back as it slowly started to move. You never realize how long it takes a sun roof to close until water is dumping on your head. FML
Today, while leaving late for work, I walked out to my car only to find the back window broken. Worst part was, I still had to go to work because no one who could cover me showed up. FML
Today, I looked outside and I saw that my new car had been snowed on. Sadly the snow had frozen onto the car, so I spent the entire day getting it off. I came inside. By 8pm, my car had snow all over it again, and this time I left the window open. FML
Today, while I was working replacing a windshield, some jerk off hit my truck. A truck carrying 2k in glass, including the windshield I was about to install. The driver gets out and says, "Sorry man, I had to text my girlfriend." FML
Today, I went to city hall to pay for a parking ticket. After returning to my truck, I found a parking ticket on my window. FML
Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML
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Top comments
Sub_Zero_is_God 13
I hope OP's boss did not chalk him up for taking such a long time
WCARlover 35
Window chalk is so hard to get off! I feel your pain :/
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Comments (60)
twofirstnames 12
You should've gotten paid for it.
gyroballer 0
I'd make that retard grab a towel and sponge and wash my whole car
erockinthesuburb 17
Was it your boss that did it? If so, revenge is a dish best served cold...
Legendslayer222 26
Actually I prefer my revenge served up cold. When you warm it up it gets all mushy. Anyway, the point my last sentence failed to make is that it would be unwise to take revenge on the person who can fire you especially when there is no evidence he was responsible.
Ketchup_Castle 30
My first thought too was that his boss did it.
Pendragon525 0
I'm wondering if that's considered vandalism (I'm betting it is). Call the cops next time & see how long your jerk boss laughs then.
Richard16 0
Do it to your manager and get yourself a good laugh out of it.
DocBastard 40
Yes, an excellent plan! Piss off the guy who signs your paychecks, is responsible for your work hours and duties, and can even fire you for defacing his property. Brilliant! Not to mention the fact that OP never says the boss did it.
Lenho 26
1) The boss doesn't have to know OP did it nor see him laugh. OP wins. 2) The proposal was to get a laugh out of it, not revenge. OP and #25 win.
ghostland 0
at least your car didn't get broken into. that would be worse
Klug_fml 7
At least they didn't put an alligator in it.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Well at least you didnt left the window open and find some homeless guy ******** in it (fml reference)
5t3ff1k4h 47
...It completely defeats the purpose of referencing an FML when you actually say that's what you're doing. It would have been a lot funnier if you hadn't said (FML reference).
Pendragon525 0
Good point. I hadn't thought of it that way.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Well then, its better than some ignorant comment sayin- ahhhhh **** it, you're right i fail.
sman22 1
That would DRIVE me insane!
yeakoolstorybro 6
CAREFUL NOT TO SCRATCH IT....you'll wake up the 1st grader in the trunk.then he'll never wake up on time to finish the rest of your paperworks,i mean homework.
RealDjRatchet 0
Who would do such a thing!? Lol