Today, after a lifetime of being single, my parents finally found me a nice, intelligent, pretty girl. I was really excited, until she backed out on me when she found out our star signs don't match. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. Later on, his mom pulls me aside and tells me to back off, saying he will never marry someone like me and he should be with a nice girl like his ex. They broke up after he found her in his bed with his roomate. FML
A slight overreaction
Today, our daughter has actually been dating a decent guy, compared to the usual losers, and was going to meet his parents. My wife put her foot in it by repeating over and over again how important meeting the parents is. She psyched her out so bad, she cancelled meeting his parents and dumped him. FML
What are the odds?
Today, I re-joined a popular on-line dating service. I'd first signed up 3 years ago and was matched with a wonderful woman. After about a year, she broke up with me. I was devastated. After two years of trying to win her back, I'd decided it's best just to move on. Guess who they matched me with? FML
Don't be that guy
Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML
Astrology is bullshit, get better friends
Today, my friend reminded me that I have been on a ton of dates lately, but couldn't get a girlfriend because I thought something was off with them all. He also reminded me that I have dated every zodiac sign, meaning I'm out of options. FML
Gotcha!
Today, my brother set me up on a blind date. I've been single for years and he said she was a perfect match for me, so I was excited. Turned out the fucker was playing a prank. The girl was my sister, who was just as surprised as I was. FML
Today, I met a girl who's the whole package: brains, beauty, shared interests, great personality, single, and into me. Too bad I married my bitchy, depressive high school girlfriend who said she'd kill herself if I didn't. Sometimes, she still tells me she'll do it if we divorce. I believe her. FML
Today, I realized out how sad my love life is when I got excited that the number a girl gave me turned out to really be hers. FML
Thanks but no thanks
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Is this catfishing?
Today, I went on a date with someone I've been talking to online for weeks. Unfortunately, it turns out they'd used old photos and misrepresented themselves, and I didn't find them attractive at all. Even I'm not that desperate. We ended up having an awkward dinner and I couldn't wait for it to be over. FML
Top comments
Stachelschaf 15
doesn't sound that intelligent to me
Tripartita 45
I'm sorry you missed out on a date with a nice… erm, pretty girl, OP.
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Comments (55)
Mathalamus 25
At least your parents tried their best to help you.
withered 30
**** her life for being forced into marriage. I too would come up with any excuse I could if I were in her situation. Sad this still happens today.
Sunflora219 26
Clearly, she isn't being 'forced' if she still has the right to say 'no' and back out of it. Which is the case with most arranged marriages in this day and age -- both parties have the right to say no. Also, arranged marriages aren't completely bad, as everyone seems to keep saying. My parents had an arranged marriage and have been married to each other for 27 years -- they're happy. There are tons of people in southaisan cultures who have arranged marriages and are still happy. It works in Asian culture because the culture is more family oriented, the same way love marriages work in western cultures because it revolves more around individualism.
manuwish 9
why rely on your parents to find a girl? OP, open up your heart and get out there! I'm sure you'll find your match as soon as you find yourself! maybe you should go travelling and work on your self accomplishment and the one who belongs with you will show up unexpectedly but right on time :)
Furcorn_57 17
India... This was in India. It is typical in India.
musicman_amit 20
apne desh mei aisyach hota buntai
Rezzurextion 3
Stupid people like that girl trigger me.
nuppa 2
I would have went and watched hot anime girls to fill my loveless heart ?
AvidCollector 6
If that's her reason, she wasn't worth it in the first place.
upgradestorm1 20
Dude no, you dodged a bullet matrix style (most) girls like that are crazy
872418 7
"My parents finally found me"? What? I hope that was just how the FML was written and not you thinking it's your parents' job to find you a girl. Go out and find someone yourself if you've been single so long.
daskilldballr314 2
I guess it wasn't written in the stars