Today, a judge gave my ex custody of my two sons, most of my money, my house, my car, and has ordered me to take anger management classes. We're getting a divorce because she shot me with a gun. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Desperate
Today, my ex-wife announced that she's taking me to court for child support. Her kids were just my stepkids and we weren't even married a year, but she apparently has a pretty good lawyer on her side. FML
****** around, found out
Today, my teenage son broke into my gun safe, took my gun, and dumped the magazine into the side of his ex-girlfriend's family home. He's completely stunned that he was arrested and charged with attempted murder. My wife blames me and wants a divorce. FML
Y'all better run
Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML
Today, I finally got a restraining order against my violent ex. My mom now keeps finding ways to tell me how shitty I am for breaking the "poor boy's" heart and how I didn't deserve him anyway. FML
Mother of the year
Today, my ex-wife brought the kids to me angry that she had tried to pick up some guy but the kids ruined it just by being there, so she brought them to my house because she couldn’t be bothered this week. The judge giving her primary custody is a travesty of our legal system. FML
Unstable
Today, I won my custody battle. I wish I could be happy about it, but it strained my current marriage so badly that now I'm going through my second divorce. FML
Fight club
Today, my new wife kept taunting and goading my ex into a fight. Now, instead of an amicable co-parenting situation, I have multiple court dates and a child support order. My wife won’t apologize and my ex doesn’t want her around the kids. FML
Commited
Today, my wife demanded a divorce and full custody of our younger kids, all because I had our drug-addicted daughter arrested for theft. FML
Bad sitcom levels of incompetence
Today, in a moment reminiscent of Two and a Half Men, my divorce lawyer screwed me over and gave my soon-to-be-ex-wife 90% of everything. I now need to pay a new lawyer to fix what she screwed up. And yes, she was lashing out at me because my brother had sex with her then never called her back. FML
Let it go
Today, I found out my ex-wife (who I have kids with) is now pregnant with another guy's twin babies. We have only been divorced a couple of months. FML
Top comments
keble 9
I mean, regardless of who's at fault, it's obvious we aren't getting the full story here
interesting33 37
from what you've written that is disgusting and surely illegal?. can you kick up a storm with a politician a d a charity? she should definitely not be having custody of any children by the sound of what you've written
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Comments (33)
raspution 21
I got arrested once because i confronted my x for cheating and she started hitting me with a hot frying pan so i grabbed her arm and made her drop it. Apparently i was suppose to let her keep hitting me.
heavenlyassbutt 11
You dodged a bullet, well maybe not.
Anda Iso 5
I have a feeling there’s more to this story and that she shot you because she was defending herself, and now you’re trying to play the victim for attention
SamanthaThe1st 23
Well that's a little vague isn't it? What, did you just copy and paste this from A Voice for Men's official copypasta?
wrenavery90 12
I can't help but feel we're missing some information.