Today, a judge gave my ex custody of my two sons, most of my money, my house, my car, and has ordered me to take anger management classes. We're getting a divorce because she shot me with a gun. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Desperate
Today, my ex-wife announced that she's taking me to court for child support. Her kids were just my stepkids and we weren't even married a year, but she apparently has a pretty good lawyer on her side. FML
****** around, found out
Today, my teenage son broke into my gun safe, took my gun, and dumped the magazine into the side of his ex-girlfriend's family home. He's completely stunned that he was arrested and charged with attempted murder. My wife blames me and wants a divorce. FML
Y'all better run
Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML
Today, I finally got a restraining order against my violent ex. My mom now keeps finding ways to tell me how shitty I am for breaking the "poor boy's" heart and how I didn't deserve him anyway. FML
Mother of the year
Today, my ex-wife brought the kids to me angry that she had tried to pick up some guy but the kids ruined it just by being there, so she brought them to my house because she couldn’t be bothered this week. The judge giving her primary custody is a travesty of our legal system. FML
Unstable
Today, I won my custody battle. I wish I could be happy about it, but it strained my current marriage so badly that now I'm going through my second divorce. FML
Fight club
Today, my new wife kept taunting and goading my ex into a fight. Now, instead of an amicable co-parenting situation, I have multiple court dates and a child support order. My wife won’t apologize and my ex doesn’t want her around the kids. FML
Commited
Today, my wife demanded a divorce and full custody of our younger kids, all because I had our drug-addicted daughter arrested for theft. FML
Bad sitcom levels of incompetence
Today, in a moment reminiscent of Two and a Half Men, my divorce lawyer screwed me over and gave my soon-to-be-ex-wife 90% of everything. I now need to pay a new lawyer to fix what she screwed up. And yes, she was lashing out at me because my brother had sex with her then never called her back. FML
Let it go
Today, I found out my ex-wife (who I have kids with) is now pregnant with another guy's twin babies. We have only been divorced a couple of months. FML
Top comments
keble 9
I mean, regardless of who's at fault, it's obvious we aren't getting the full story here
interesting33 37
from what you've written that is disgusting and surely illegal?. can you kick up a storm with a politician a d a charity? she should definitely not be having custody of any children by the sound of what you've written
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Comments (33)
acmariner99 25
I thought equality meant equal and fair treatment under the law. How in the world did she get all of that?
The_Khan 12
It is fairly well known that men generally do not win in family court. Some for good reasons, but I highly doubt all or even most. There is a bias in favor of woman in the family court, we are just used to it. Loothtimesthewouldolawyer'advicecececlaiabusephysicallyalalalalalalalalall if possible, mental if not, for a huge bonus with the courts favor. And hey, if I hated my ex (unfaithfulness for example) and had the opportunity to risk-free use that kindoweapowitthamassivpayouwithireachprobablylylylylylylylylyy would too. But I am a man, so I cannot. The system is the problem.
mt21mt 15
I like how your comment makes you look like you are having a stroke, I made one like that earlier too, I'm glad it isn't just me!
Mungolikecandy 19
We seem to be only getting part of the story here.
Matt Much 12
Most of those are the same reasons why I have zero desire to ever get married.
ohsnapword 21
Fire your lawyer.
cardin06 15
I would like the full story... sounds like there is something missing.
sharond23 10
I'm pretty sure you're not giving us all the facts.
tonyfan00 38
Thanks Obama!
tonyfan00 38
Okay, on a serious note: There is clearly more to this story if the judge thinks the kids are safer with her versus yourself. I'm not giving her an excuse that she had the right to fire a gun at you, but there is nearly always some type of motive. Yes, it sucks, but there has to be a good explanation behind this.
staticballoons 5
A judge isn’t going to order that unless you did something wrong. Perhaps she shot you in self defense because you’re abusive?
Jarred Sellmeyer 11
That’s bullshit. Fight the power.