Today, I found out my awesome new boyfriend loves a show called Happy Tree Friends, about cutesy animals dying horribly. When I say "loves", I mean he masturbates to it. I'm running very fast and very far away now. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were watching a TV show about wildlife. The moment the narrator said the word "peacock", my boyfriend broke down into hysterical laughter. He laughed to the point of tears, and had to excuse himself. I'm dating a man-child. FML
Today, I stumbled across my boyfriend's tumblr page. I've known him for years and never knew he had one. Being curious, I decided to give it a look, only to be ambushed by a wall of furry porn. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, less than a week after ranting to my husband about how sick some people are to sexualize characters from kids' TV shows, I looked through his browser history and found out he's very much into Powerpuff Girls porn. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML
Today, after what I thought was an amazing sex session with my boyfriend, he let out a big sigh and told me I need to watch more porn. FML
Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Good call. He was just testing you by seeing if you're ok with videos of animals dying. If you could handle that, he was going to move on to snuff films. And that might happen after it's too late to run.
cuz803 46
I use to love that show when I was a kid lmao but wow. Getting off to animals dying stupidly? He must have a gore fetish. There's also episodes of the animals killing each other so maybe he's having homicidal thoughts. Indeed, good call running away from him.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
Good call. He was just testing you by seeing if you're ok with videos of animals dying. If you could handle that, he was going to move on to snuff films. And that might happen after it's too late to run.
cuz803 46
I use to love that show when I was a kid lmao but wow. Getting off to animals dying stupidly? He must have a gore fetish. There's also episodes of the animals killing each other so maybe he's having homicidal thoughts. Indeed, good call running away from him.
BurnInDemonFire 39
How new was this new boyfriend that he felt confident enough to tell you he jacks it to Happy Tree Friends? And are you sure that was his limit? He didn't have his own pets, did he? If he does, alert the "SCPA" of whatever country you live in while you're fleeing.
cdawg420 1
run fast and don’t look back
Taurus_ChicKa 37
You are definitely doing the right thing. Run, and don't stop.