Today, I was at work and was confronted by a customer wanting to get a "Nemo" fish. I explained that 'Nemo' needs to live in saltwater, not freshwater, like their tank was. The customer then turns around and grabs a perforated tank divider and says, "Can't I just split them up with this?" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while I was working at a sushi restaurant, a guy told me he wanted the table next to the "koi fish tank", because he wanted to let the fish know what happens when they "cross him". FML
Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML
Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
Today, a man asked about fishing in the river that flows beside where I work. I said you could, but anything you caught under 5 inches has to be thrown back. His wife then said, "Wish I knew that before I married him." I started to laugh. The man almost cried and complained to my boss. FML
Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a customer because her entrée was too fishy. I'm not the chef, just the waiter, and I work at a fish grill. FML
Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML
Today, I found out why you shouldn't drop instant mashed potatoes in a fish tank, especially when you have expensive fish. FML
Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
redbluegreen 41
What's not to get? A perforated tank divider is a fish tank divider with holes in it, thus defeating the purpose of separating different kinds of water. They're used to separate fish that would usually fight each other. Since water molecules are obviously a lot smaller than fish, they would get through the holes. Personally, I wouldn't want to sell anyone an animal if they didn't know the name of it. I think there's actually something that says pet store employees can refuse selling an animal if the person wanting to make a purchase seems incompetent enough, because it would result in the death of the pet.
ZOMBlE 0
Shoulda smacked a bitch.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (238)
asherah14 7
I used to work in a pet store and once had a customer ask me where the chinchillas were. I showed him the chinchillas in the small animal cages and he corrected me that chinchillas are fish. He really meant to ask where the cichlids were.
ViviMage 40
Sell a freshwater clown loach. Issue solved!
pheonix_flash 7
People are so dumb these days
Folly_fml 12
Is perforated really such a hard word to understand? The divider had holes in it. No use in dividing a tank with something that has holes in it.
Baller_Bob 17
Just tell her to leace
LizKlinexo 1
Some of these commenters are just as dumb as the customer
RachaelAnna92 3
I don't really see how this is a **** your life?? if has no affect on your life how stupid some guy you will never see again is.