Today, I brought a girl home. My dad's first reaction was to pull out the camera and snap away. She now won't reply to my texts or calls. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML
Today, I brought a boy home for the first time, only to have my dad ask him what his mother's maiden name was. When he answered, my dad exclaimed, "Oh yeah! I think I dated her in high school. I could be your father!" FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to meet my parents. My dad thought it'd be hilarious to act surprised and ask me if I'd already dumped the girlfriend I introduced him to yesterday. She slapped me and stormed out of the house before my dad could tell her it was a joke. FML
Today, I finally invited my girlfriend over to meet my oddball parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "So, you're the silly girl who agreed to date my dickhead son." It went downhill from there. FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time. I was really excited to introduce her to my parents, until we found my mother waving around a wooden sword, and my father trying to shove my sister into the dryer. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. We got on the discussion of animals, and I showed them a picture of my cat on my phone. Being a touchscreen, when her father grabbed it, it changed picture. To a picture of my girlfriend, fully nude. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML
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Top comments
Simoneaux17 11
Your profile says you're 16 yet you have a picture of yourself smoking. Should have thought that through a little more.
ChaosAngel17 14
Well, at least people can't say pics or it didn't happen.
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Comments (114)
perdix 31
You didn't mention your dad was laying on the floor shooting up.
downtime 13
The sad thing is it took me a moment to realise you weren't suggesting the father is a heroin addict...*facepalm*
RedPillSucks 33
That would have put an interesting twist on things, though.
iliketurdles 7
Aha, I know. I was kidding. I'm half Arab myself.
LaughinStock 16
She's a noor not a nun, I'm a dog and I even know that. :)
jskains 6
As long as she isnt strapping a bomb to her body. Apparently the new thing is boob bombs. They put explosives in silicone implants. Talk about a booby trap.
Vball6 19
40- Why bring up a stereotype that has nothing to do with the comment.
margie2194 12
Lol "we're riding camels tonight" that just made my morning. Lol
NothingsEasy 4
Yeah....I'm gonna have to take a picture of you to remember who you Are....could you stand over there?
andiiturtle 0
Way to go dad, way to go -.-
AlexSnower 0
Haha
ExToRtiOn 0
Good excuse for Break up