Today, I told my nephew to be careful when crossing the street in front of a bus because it might eat him. We then watched as a bus slowed down and stopped in front of a group of people. When the bus moved away, all the people were gone. My nephew is terrified, and won't stop crying. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML
Today, I had to catch a shuttle bus. I awoke to the sound of a car horn. I ran out in my boxers and saw a bus take off down the road. I chased it, thinking I had missed my bus. I realized I hadn't only when I saw frightened kids in the back of the bus. FML
Today, my tired son and I were riding a shuttle bus. An old lady got on, and I told him we needed to get up so she could have the seat. He started crying and screamed, "WHY? She's old, she's gonna die soon!" I wanted to melt into the ground. FML
Today, I was picking up my nephew from school. I waved when I saw him coming, shouted, “Hey dude!” The kid stared at me, confused. That’s when I realized it wasn’t my nephew, just a child who looked vaguely similar but who was now terrified. His actual mom gave me a look like she was deciding whether to call security. FML
Today, I was on the bus. I have a phobia of babies crying, and recently, whenever I've been on a long journey, there's been one and I've had an anxiety attack. There were no babies on this bus, just an old lady showing her friend videos of her screaming grandchild. FML
Today, I was almost hit by a bus, missing me by a few centimetres, and only because I jumped back the moment I heard its horn. I was using the zebra crossing, and the lights were green for me. FML
Today, after taking my little niece out onto the balcony of her family's new apartment to enjoy the view, we watched as a man jaywalked across the street down below and was run over by a car. My niece is pretty much traumatized for life now. FML
Today, I was babysitting my nephew and told him he could “say anything” to the nice old lady at the park who gave him candy. He looked her dead in the eye and said, “My aunt says people your age shouldn’t drive anymore.” She glared at me like I'd ran over her cat. FML
Today, while dropping my son off at the bus stop before school, I went to give him a kiss on the cheek. Then, before I was able to make contact, he jumped away, yelled "PSYCH!!!!" as loud as he could, and jumped on the bus. The kids all laughed at me and the other parents looked embarrassed for me. FML
Today, my three year-old son excitedly went to the window to watch the construction site next door. He does this all the time and it's adorable… at least, it was until a man got run over by a bulldozer with him watching. He screamed for hours and now cries if I don't keep the curtains closed. FML
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Top comments
EatOrphans4Fun 24
The wheels on the bus go "nom nom nom".
randomguy76 14
YDI... There is no need to fool children into doing the things you want them to do. Tell them the truth and have them face reality. They will thank you for it in the future.
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Comments (63)
randomguy76 14
YDI... There is no need to fool children into doing the things you want them to do. Tell them the truth and have them face reality. They will thank you for it in the future.
loueasy 23
Don't get into the van that gives free candy. He might stick his peepee in your butt.
crudeandrudeguy 29
As shown right here sometimes you may want to sugar coat the truth...
BeenIt 5
You are so right. I hate when people make up stories.
randomguy76 14
#35 Sugar coating is not necessary. Change what #32 wrote to " Don't get into strangers vans, they may be dangerous." White lies hurt our youth's understanding of the world.
Dave_Davington 34
One time, I got into a stranger's van when he offered me free sweets. Unfortunately for him, the sugar made me hyperactive and I ended up raping him.
Setareh23 34
Agreed. I understand joking with your kids a bit when they're old enough to figure something's up, but when it comes to actual life lessons about important and possibly dangerous issues, it's definitely better to go with the truth.
tomvertigo 17
Massive difference between telling a kid not to talk to stranngers and, sau for example, OP's post, though. Do you let kids believe in Santa and the Tooth Fairy? Those are white lies that perpetuate the ideal of everything deserving some kind of gift or reward for doing nothing at all...
Camry_Girl420 18
Don't be a stick in the mud. Its hilarious. Its people like you who are probably offended by everything in 2015 too. From the confederate flag to guns. Lay off
EatOrphans4Fun 24
The wheels on the bus go "nom nom nom".
Chicagoillinois 18
I can't like this comment enough
chrisbeaudoin 26
Perfect name #2 eatorphansforfun
TheBelt 19
I think this deserves top comment
ruckfules85 34
more like the bus on the wheels go "nom nom nom" XD
DaRito 25
Maybe it's time to tell him the truth and show proof that busses don't eat people.
bigdfootball97 24
Why would you tell your nephew something like that? Just be honest!
UhHuhHoney 20
Well good luck sending the kid to school on a bus.
BeenIt 5
Right!!! Just wreckless.
thestoryofacaleb 14
That was me with elevators when I was a kid. I called them "alligators".
thatnakedguy 17
I totally relate to this after seeing the incident in China
khoov19 20
parenting(or child rearing)at its finest...well done!!!!
TomeDr 25
What a stupid thing to tell him!
gogo44444 28
Terrible parenting op
ScratchCatPower 32
Not parenting...
mariathehoe 15
That's why you don't tell kids things like that!