Today, I was applying Icy Hot. I squeezed the bottle too hard making it squirt in my eye. I ran to the bathroom in agony, turned on the faucet, and slammed my face right into it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I accidentally threw a glass of iced tea in my own face, because the restaurant I'd been going to for over a decade switched from heavy glass mugs to identical light-as-a-feather plastic mugs. FML
Today, while I was eating spicy wings, I suddenly sneezed. I was sitting in front of a fan and effectively maced myself when my spicy sneeze blew back into my face and eyes. FML
Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML
Today, I was clipping my abnormally thick toenails. I had to apply so much pressure on the clippers that a nail flew off, hit me in the eyeball and scratched my cornea. The doctor nearly fell off his chair laughing during my eye exam after I told him what happened. FML
Today, while walking down the street, a truck hit a puddle and splashed me with water. After I cursed and flipped him off, he put his truck in reverse and splashed me again. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, as I was walking back to my dorm, I looked down and thought, "I wonder why the ground is wet in just this one spot?" Then I got hit with a water balloon. FML
Today, I was getting ready for a date when I noticed a spot on my chin. To get rid of it, I applied my sister's spot cream rather than picking it off. Within minutes, my entire chin looked like a swollen tomato. FML
Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the crack in the door. I quickly looked away, but about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML
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Top comments
SeduceRecycle 0
Nooooooo good.
YupImBack 0
shit happens
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Comments (75)
marissacelina11 0
abahahh, wow you suck
saltandpepper 0
hahaha aw poor you
jay4who7 0
I don't know about u but when I use icy hot it's always hot then cold,but it works(not in ur eyes) lol ful op.
kieran247 0
OwNowBrownCow 0
2kool4skoolyo 0
fmlx1211 0
aaawwee feel better
nero9112 4
wasnext you going to drown yourself? please do
yolie_fml 0
Wow. Do you need attention?
timtuttlez 1
So was your eye icy or hot when you bounced your face off of the faucet?
yolie_fml 0
I'm curious, too.
darkmis1 18
I love icyhot! I carry it around in my backpack all the time! I barely get a second to sit down, because I'm a theatre major with acting and dance classes and lots of exercise lolz. It sucks if it goes in the wrong place though.....>.>
chesthairfiesta 0
Defs not the first time you've been squirted in the eye is it?
christyxoxo 8
oh damn that must hurt.