Today, after being sick and not having coffee for a month, my body has invented a new way of processing caffeine: The tiredness and lethargy remains untouched, while the caffeine-jolt is converted directly into a fuzzy headache. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I learned that all the caffeine my body can handle and boundless energy will not stop me from yawning. Thirty times in an hour. FML
Today, I was trying to ease off a caffeine headache. I ended up getting a Brain Freeze. FML
Today, I realized that if I consume caffeine in any way, shape, or form, it exacerbates my insomnia to the point that sleeping for more than two hours in the night is impossible. I'm not even sure if that's the actual cause. I don't know what's wrong with me anymore, and my anxiety-ridden brain is milking it. FML
Today, I've been caffeine-free for 2 weeks. It's turned me into a constipated angry bitch. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's after over a week of feeling extremely tired and having headaches. His advice? "When I'm tired I drink coffee. You should drink coffee." Somehow, I don't think that was worth $60. FML
Today, my parents took my to hospital with headache, cramps, sweats and tremors. The doctor thought I was an drug addict in withdrawal, which, after some questions, turns out I am. I gave up fizzy soda last week and am in total withdrawal from caffeine and all the other addictive chemicals in soda. FML
Today, I have a massive paradox on my hands. My doctor told me to stop drinking so much tea to combat my sleeplessness, and it worked. Until now. I went to the doctor again to figure out why it suddenly stopped working, and she told me the reason I can't sleep now is because I have caffeine withdrawal. FML
Today, I figured out why I have been feeling so drowsy and lethargic for the past week. My daughter had been slipping sleeping pills into my coffee as payback for taking her phone away. FML
Today, like most days recently, and even after 10 hours of sleep, I need at least 3 cups of coffee per day in order be able to… sit on the sofa and, well, not fall asleep. FML
Today, I can't drink coffee anymore due to its turbo-diarrhea effect on me. I also have to take something with caffeine everyday or I will have a migraine, so I drink Diet Coke. Today, I saw on TV that even two cans of soda a week erase the heart health gains made during exercise. Goodbye, healthy hearth. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (0)
No comments yet.