Today, I learned that all the caffeine my body can handle and boundless energy will not stop me from yawning. Thirty times in an hour. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after being sick and not having coffee for a month, my body has invented a new way of processing caffeine: The tiredness and lethargy remains untouched, while the caffeine-jolt is converted directly into a fuzzy headache. FML
Today, I realized that if I consume caffeine in any way, shape, or form, it exacerbates my insomnia to the point that sleeping for more than two hours in the night is impossible. I'm not even sure if that's the actual cause. I don't know what's wrong with me anymore, and my anxiety-ridden brain is milking it. FML
Today, like most days recently, and even after 10 hours of sleep, I need at least 3 cups of coffee per day in order be able to… sit on the sofa and, well, not fall asleep. FML
Today, my boss made me come in at 10 a.m. instead of noon like he usually does. I’ve had nine cups of coffee and STILL can’t keep my eyes open. Why am I like this? FML
Today, after finishing work and collecting my bag from my locker, I yawned as my manager came to ask me a question. She yelled at me for yawning. She then told others that I have a chronic yawning problem at work and need medical intervention. I can't even yawn once after a long tiring day on my own time. FML
Today, I realized that procrastinating studying for my finals until the last day would end up in me failing, irrespective of how much caffeine I consume. FML
Today, I drank two and a half Panera charged lemonades to feel more motivated and ended up feeling itchy and overstimulated due to the lethal caffeine-sugar combo and got nothing done. FML
Today, I have a massive paradox on my hands. My doctor told me to stop drinking so much tea to combat my sleeplessness, and it worked. Until now. I went to the doctor again to figure out why it suddenly stopped working, and she told me the reason I can't sleep now is because I have caffeine withdrawal. FML
Today, I decided to turn over a new leaf. I slept eleven hours instead of twelve, with the intention of cutting down to eight. Instead, my body chose to faint from exhaustion. FML
Today, I realised just how caffeine dependent I am. I didn't have time for my morning coffee, work is out of milk, and I only have $1.30 in my bank account, so I couldn't buy a coffee. Today has been a struggle. FML
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Top comments
Anderling 33
That’d be because yawning is not solely linked to tiredness but also to boredom, tension or stress, and ambient temperature. Side note, this post was kinda boring to me.
ejfs 8
Unstoppable yawning can also be a side effect of some medications (anti depressants do it a lot) or common conditions like iron anemia. Perhaps a check up is in order?
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Comments (6)
Anderling 33
That’d be because yawning is not solely linked to tiredness but also to boredom, tension or stress, and ambient temperature. Side note, this post was kinda boring to me.
TomeDr 25
Sounds to me like you’re trying to replace sleep with caffeine. Your body and brain knows the difference.
ejfs 8
Unstoppable yawning can also be a side effect of some medications (anti depressants do it a lot) or common conditions like iron anemia. Perhaps a check up is in order?
RichardPencil 32
That's methed up! Massive doses of legal low-potency stimulants is such a waste.
poopface82 25
Not enough oxygen to the brain. Might want to get that checked out.
protoskore 27
caffeine does not wake us up. it just prevents the brain from realizing how tired we are