Today, and since New Year's Day, my husband has instituted a lateness jar. I have to put £1 in every time my “pissing about getting ready makes us more than 10 minutes late.” I really tried to embarrass him with how empty it would be, but he counted it today. It’s only mid February and it’s already over £100. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommates were inspired by a TV show to make a "douchebag jar", into which we have to put money every time we say something obnoxious. It seems like I can't open my mouth without having to cough up £10. FML
Today, I gave my wife a £55 gin Advent calendar. She gave me a £1 one with chocolates i don't like. FML
Today, after creating a swear jar for my son, I came back to find a $20 bill in it and him saying, "How much does that buy?" FML
Today, I had no money on me, so I asked my husband to put money in the cancer charity box for me. He grumbled about it, then realised he only had £10 notes, so he gave them a tenner but asked the lady if she could break open the sealed box to give him £9 in change. FML
Today, I asked my husband to be a little more responsible, pick up after himself, and spend a little less. I earn more than he does, so it's usually my money that he splurges. He has gone on a non-stop tantrum for the past 5 hours, giving me the cold shoulder, and shouting at me. What have I gotten myself into? FML
Today, my first day at my new job, a guy decided to pay all his parking fines in one go. All £2300 of them. Yes, he did decide to pay it in pennies. Wheelbarrows and buckets full of pennies. That's 230,000 pennies. Guess whose job it was to count them. FML
Today, I added some of my own money to the tip jar in the Subway I work at to make myself look less pathetic. FML
Today, I got home and my wife asked me to help yell at the kids for ruining over £1000 of her makeup supplies. I did an almost double take at the fact I had no idea she had spent over £1000 just on makeup. No wonder we’re always broke the end of the month. FML
Today, because my fiancé is criminally incompetent at budgeting, I'm now having to pay the first installment for my own wedding ring. FML
Today, I gave my husband an expensive watch. The first words out of his mouth were, "You didn't use our joint bank account for this, right?" He then asked if I still had the receipt. FML
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Top comments
Tartara 15
The math ain't mathing. 100 means 100 times, in less than 2 months so less than 60 days. Are you really averaging being late 2 times a day every single day? While on your best behavior? And then the amount was a surprise even though you've put in at least 2 a day every single day? Right.
Nico97 3
he’s proven his point
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Comments (5)
Nico97 3
he’s proven his point
Tartara 15
The math ain't mathing. 100 means 100 times, in less than 2 months so less than 60 days. Are you really averaging being late 2 times a day every single day? While on your best behavior? And then the amount was a surprise even though you've put in at least 2 a day every single day? Right.
easybree 10
lmaooo right why lie
Yudith 28
It's time to really step up your game. First, invest in a quality alarm clock. Second, cut into your routine. Do you really need to wash your hair before this appointment? Is makeup really necessary? Can't you eat in the car? Third, learn to delegate. Your husband can change the baby's diaper, scoop up the cat litter, and hound those last-minute supplies your kid just remembered he needed for school today. Concentrate on being on time.
nathanteems 1
well at least you got some money to spend for later
Billsonhamsen 17
I think your husband is being generous with allowing you to be 10 min late before you need to pay.