Today, I got a letter of complaint from my landlord. It said my loud, obnoxious trampling is disturbing my downstairs neighbor, and I have to stop. I'm small and hardly weigh anything, but it seems that if I want to keep my lease, I'll have to master the art of levitating. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a noise complaint about "loud stomping" in my apartment disturbing the tenant below. I guess I'm supposed to tell my sweet children that they are no longer allowed to play in their own home. FML
Today, I found out my upstairs neighbors filed a noise complaint against me for banging on the ceiling every night. They conveniently left out the part where they constantly stomp, shout, and do stuff that sounds like they're dropping bricks to the floor every night. FML
Today, my batshit crazy downstairs neighbor threatened me with "legal action" for making too much noise. According to her, it’s "illegal" for people in upstairs apartments to use vacuum cleaners, therefore I must sweep my carpets to avoid disturbing her and her imaginary guests. FML
Today, my downstairs neighbours screamed at me for making so much noise that I woke their children up and made them cry. The noise was the sound of a loose floorboard shifting as I crept to my bathroom, and again on my way back to bed. They've sworn to get me evicted. FML
Today, yet again, my upstairs neighbor can’t stop stomping. It’s troubling. There are random noises and thuds at 3 a.m. I've emailed the leasing office several times to no avail. I even told the leasing office that I didn't care if my neighbor has insomnia, I really don’t, I just have to be up at work by 6:00 a.m. every day. FML
Today, my new neighbor just put up really loud wind chimes. I just got a ton of letters under my door, stating if I don't take them down, they're going to file a noise complaint with the building management. She owns her condo, I don't. FML
Today, my neighbors in the apartment above me yet again had a loud fight, well past midnight while I was trying to sleep. I stood on my bed and pounded on the ceiling to shut them up. And now I'll have to explain the two fist-shaped holes in the ceiling to my landlord. FML
Today, I live on the second floor and my neighbor from below banged on my door, telling me I sounded like a giant elephant and needed to learn to be quiet. I was eating ice cream in bed. I also live alone. FML
Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
Today, I realized how nice it was that, after moving into my ground-floor apartment, I no longer have to worry about being too loud walking on the floor at night. Today, I found out that my upstairs neighbors do not have any qualms about shouting or stomping their feet loudly at night, either. FML
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Top comments
every1luvsboners 11
I'd buy a pogo stick and jump nonstop until I went through the floor and landed on the arseholes head.
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
Sounds like oP could use lightweight and ninja pro
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Comments (137)
yellowman57 13
That sucks, you should tell the elephant, who ever it is, an tell them that they need to loose wieght
ohmandapants 17
Read the FML again buddy.
perdix 31
You mean you're small for an NFL offensive tackle and you weigh hardly more than 250?
Freeze_fml 17
You sound like you're in denial.
clsgators 5
Move your bed so it's not right over the other persons room, maybe the problem is your loud sexual interactions
AthleticSwaqq 8
'facepalm' you should've had a V8!!
MisterEx 28
Attach ropes to the ceiling and use them like Tarzan to move around the room instead of walking. Lose the scream tho.
jenesaispas2014 2
that is a freaking awesome idea! just hope OP has enough upper body strength for that!
papahugsmefunneh 2
Maybe you're underestimating your weight
zann_fml 2
My kitten is 9 1/2 pounds and sounds like a herd of wild elephants. Size/weight doesn't always matter, but flooring type does! For us, it's the type of floor and sub floor we have. Which could be the problem you're having.
KiddNYC1O 22
Those damn wooden floors.
mdtdnb 7
9 1/2 lbs is not a kitten lol
White_Knightspc 0
Use the Force. I have a bad feeling about this situation
Garytt 0
Beat me to it :(
SpicyPeppers 1
You might walk on your heels without realizing it. We had an upstairs neighbour who was about five feet tall and probably weighed 100 pounds, but she walked heavily on her heels and it was LOUD! If you don't already have floor coverings, you may want to invest in some carpets to help muffle the sound.