Today, for the first time in about 3 years, I decided to clean my car. It was going really well until I looked down at what I was about to pick up. On the back seat floor lay a dead snake, which at one point, for God knows how long, was living in my car while I unknowingly drove it around. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my car broke down in the middle of nowhere. I walked about 3 miles to the nearest house to call a tow truck. When I got back to where I left my car, it was gone. FML
Today, my car broke down. My colleague came to get me and then, later, my husband picked me up from work. We went to collect my abandoned car, but it was gone. It took 10 minutes of me panicking and thinking it had been stolen before he crumpled in laughter and told me he'd already collected it. FML
Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over something that popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, while cleaning out my garage, I found a pregnant spider. I couldn't step on the spider without releasing the baby spiders, so I went inside to get a glass jar to trap it. While trying to relocate the spider, I accidentally stepped on it. I now have a bunch of baby spiders roaming around. FML
Today, I looked into my sink's garbage disposal for the first time since I moved in two months ago. Apparently, the putrid smell was not the food I've been throwing down it, but instead, a now what appears to be mutilated litter of rats. FML
Today, as I was changing my sheets, I found a huge spider under my pillow. My 10 year-old sister had to get rid of it for me. FML
Today, I woke up to a broken car window and a text from my ex that read, "Before you ask me, the answer is yes." FML
Today, I was going to a Harry Potter convention since I love the books so much. On my drive there I got lost, and it only got worse when my car broke down. Since I'd forgotten my phone, I tried to hitch a ride. I stood on the side of a road for two hours dressed like Ron Weasley. FML
Today, I was on a plane heading home from vacation with the family, when went to relieve my bladder and stepped on someone's shit. They seemingly decided the floor was a better then the toilet. I walked all the way back to my seat with shit on my sandal, my sister thought I'd shat myself. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
You would think it would smell at some point. Or at least attract enough insects to annoy you. I don't know how some people manage to live in filth sometimes. I mean three YEARS?
emadee 0
oh ew thats awful
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Comments (148)
xTinyLovex 0
Oh Lordy I would have flipped out! D:
blueflame 2
It probably wasn't in there for long. It would have needed things to eat (which could be why it died) at it wouldn't have lasted too long that way or someone put it in there as a prank.
anthaz_fml 0
most snakes can go without food for months...or they couldve been little nasty mice running around his disgusting car o.o
what_thefk 0
holy shit dude
moonlight_daze 8
YDI for unknowingly driving your car. Seriously, like #87 said, that's hazardous!
shootingstar8D 0
We dirty pig
Kay_Ell_Dee 0
How the hell did the snake even get in?? Eww. I would have freaked. I can't stand reptiles.
dyschordia 0
Snakes get into cars all the time here. Generally it's because they either get under the bonnet (I guess U.S. folk'd call it the hood) because the engine was warm or are flicked up by car tyres if they are run over. They then usually get into the interior of the car through the ventilation system. The ones who are flicked up are usually quite angry when they get inside and the car empties quite rapidly (yes, it HAS happened to me in a friend's car). LMAO I love living in Australia. This is normal for many of us =D To quote the Scared Weird Little Guys: "Come to Australia - You might accidentally get killed" lol
ryansims 0
because you never clean your car you dirty ******
allmidnighteyes 11
Whoa, a snake? What's next on the list of odd things found in your car, Madeleine McCann?
FMLeveryday11 0
#99 - I laughed so loud at that. I'm probably going to hell.
LilaBear 2
Maybe someone put a dead snake in your car as a prank?
Sherlock_Holmes_fml 0
YDI for being a slob