Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my sink seemed to be filling up with dirty water. Concerned, I turned on the garbage disposal and plunged away. With no change in the water levels, I called a plumber. He reached in, pulled out the drain plug, and give me his bill while chuckling to himself. FML
Today, I had to call a plumber out, because my idiot daughter clogged the pipes while trying to flush a hamburger down the toilet. FML
Today, due to an unforeseen pipe-related incident, I had to shave my legs in my backyard fish pond, while a plumber assessed the damage to my war-zone of a bathroom. FML
Today, I was speeding home, bursting to take a crap. I pulled into my driveway and made it inside, before my wife told me the plumber was still working on our pipes. I ended up having to take a crap in my own backyard, behind a tree. FML
Today, when I got home from work, my fiancé was finishing up with the plumber who had just installed new fixtures for our shower. I decided that I was going to be the first to break it in. I went to the bathroom, got undressed and went to start the water. The OTHER plumber was still in there. FML
Today, at work, the only toilet in the building was so clogged that it was overflowing. We didn't have a plunger, so basically the only way to stop it was to try and reach in and remove the blockage. I was nominated to do it. FML
Today, sewage came up the toilet and tub in my apartment and spread far enough to get into the hallway. The maintenance crew found the source of the blocked pipes to be a ten inch long weave some idiot flushed down a toilet. FML
Today, I tried to fix a leaking pipe under the sink. I watched a YouTube tutorial and was feeling confident that I could get the job done. Two hours later, half of the kitchen was practically flooded because I forgot to cut the water off, and scrambled to actually find the main valve, then I had to call an emergency plumber, who showed up, laughed, and fixed it in five minutes. FML
Today, I was about to get it on with a girl in the bathroom of my friend's house at a party. Just when things started getting heated, a pipe burst. Literally. There was water everywhere and everyone had to evacuate the building. I was cockblocked by poor plumbing. FML
Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
gracehi 33
Call his company and tell them he's fraternizing with the clients. Get his ass fired.
picante72 24
At least she was honest and told you immediately instead of covering it up for months or years.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (139)
unixdude 9
I saw that porno, too.
edanielleh 21
at least she told you, perhaps you could still make it work if you want to
rundas09 8
I didn't actually think that stuff happened, except in bad budget porno. Sorry OP!
Mauskau 36
She needs to stay away from the ****
underguarded 20
Holy ****. Don't even know the guy for very long and think its a great idea to be with him.. Sorry op. You should leave. She'll probably do it again
lerenard_fml 5
There are weak points in all marriages. Our refusal to see that and work harder is one of the reasons divorce rates are so high. I am not excusing her behavior, but nearly all of the long marriages ( that ended in death, not divorce) in my family came with slip-ups and mistakes. Some couples have zero tolerance, and that's okay. If my husband cheated, my trust would be shattered for years...but I understand that we are all animals and we don't like to admit it.
Icemist 6
did you at least get a discount. if not pick a nice std an call his boss recommend he seek treatment quickly
IdenarBWARGH 10
This sounds like a scene straight from a porno.
S4N 5
What a ****! You can do wayyy better. Remember you're a wonderful person. It's her fault she's a *****.
bermanss 3
Dude that sucks, I'm sorry, been through some stuff like it feel for you op