Today, I was struggling through small-talk at a party where I knew nobody. Tattoos came up and I started talking about trendy, girly tattoos like feathers, anchors and infinity signs with stupid words in them. Turns out the girl I was talking to had all three. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML
Today, I went on my third date with a great guy. We finally got round to talking about his tattoos. All 57 are related to his best friend. All of them. The best friend he never stops talking about. Somehow I don't think this will work out. FML
Today, I went to a tattoo artist to get what I thought would be really cute, elegant finger tattoos. I left with wobbly, blobby messes all over my fingers. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today on my birthday, my wife thought it would be a good idea to get matching tattoos. Our tattoo artist happened to be her ex-boyfriend. I sat and listened to them talk about their relationship and how they should stay in touch. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML
Today, I was showing my unique new tattoo to my friends when a man approaches me with his digital camera and asks if he could take a picture of the tattoo for his website. I agreed. I find out later that it's a site about ugly tattoos. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Tattoos is one subject I don't insult, because people have them for personal reasons I know nothing about.
kenleybunch 15
If she likes them, cool. But she can't get mad if people make fun of her for following the pack. My favorite is "refuse to sink" with an anchor. ANCHORS SINK PEOPLE.
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Comments (121)
weveallbeenthere 30
lol. hopefully you were not trying to impress her.
Sheh_fml 25
Why is it so terrible to have a common tattoo? Tattoos don't need to be this super-deep personal story, some just want a pretty thing. Things get cliché for a reason, because a lot of people like it, so why is it so horrible to admit you like something that others like too?
who10nanny 8
I have an anchor & helm tattooed on my shoulder, but I was also in the Navy. The helm indicates my rate & the anchor, of course, represents the Navy.
worldclassrager 41
Apologize and leave...that's all you can really do...
skittyskatbrat 19
Didn't the boring, repetitive conversation and the utter lack of individual style in her clothing clue you in that this was a cookie-cutter trend-following Barbie? :D
slyde32 12
I should read the fml again, I must have missed the part where he described her lack of style and repetitive conversation
DanielleinDC 34
Well, you couldn't have known, but maybe you shouldn't make assumptions. Still, who hasn't stuck her foot in her mouth trying to make small talk at a party?
crazytwinsmom 25
Now there's 3 things you don't discuss at parties... religion, politics, and tatoos that you think are stupid.
lowshadows 21
don't apologize, stand up for your beliefs, you weren't put on the earth to please anyone....except for men lol
ahh_rats 15
If you're riding solo you gotta do your research first haha
peachychick 1
she is unique...just like everyone else.