Today, my yearly bonus finally hit my bank account while I was busy at work. Hurrah! Unfortunately, I'm married, so by the time I got a second of free time to check my phone, my email was full of my wife's online shopping receipts, including a non-refundable cruise. I wish we could save money… FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife received a $15,000 bonus from her work. I got a backpack from mine. FML
Today, I spent some of my pay on a birthday gift for my wife. She found out about the money going missing from our account, and now she thinks I'm having an affair. I work 24/7 and barely have time to see my friends, let alone have an affair. FML
Today, to surprise my boss who promoted me within the first two months of my new job, I offered to take him and a couple of coworkers out to eat. We had one minor inconvenience: my bank card declined. I was 200$ in the negative. Apparently my wife decided to take the kids winter clothes shopping. It’s fucking April. FML
Today, my fiancée bought me a luxury getaway to the Maldives, complete with a five-star hotel and first-class plane tickets. Too bad she used my credit card, with all the money I was saving for our wedding. FML
Today, my boss told me that I was getting a promotion. I was so excited to tell my family and friends the good news, but when I got home and checked my bank account, I realized that I had accidentally transferred all of my savings to my ex's account. FML
Today, I got a $200 bonus at work and was super excited about getting a plane ticket to see my family. On the way back from work I got a $300 speeding ticket. FML
Today, even though I recently started earning $75000 per year, my partner still got angry at me because I spent $10 online. FML
Today, I found out my husband spent us into overdraft charges through compulsive online shopping. Again. FML
Today, my wife somehow found out that my "surprise bonus" from earlier this year was actually hush money from my boss to keep quiet about her affair. Rather than let a good thing alone, she threw a fit and called my boss's husband. Now I'm jobless, and my boss has sworn I'll never work in my industry again. FML
Today, I was expecting a big sum of money for skipping last year's vacation while working as a freelancer, as I've done the last four years. Turns out I won't get the money, as last month I accepted a full time employment, and now that money has been turned into vacation days instead. Guess I won't buy a new home yet… FML
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Top comments
TomeDr 25
I highly suggest you get a separate bank account and have part of your paycheck go there. Don’t hide it from your wife but let her know that her shopping habits have scared you into this action. Tell her that if you can’t save money, one disaster can both bankrupt your household and you’d never be able to retire. And if you haven’t yet set up an IRA, do that today.
SAgirl 23
Separate bank accounts, yesterday.
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Comments (3)
TomeDr 25
I highly suggest you get a separate bank account and have part of your paycheck go there. Don’t hide it from your wife but let her know that her shopping habits have scared you into this action. Tell her that if you can’t save money, one disaster can both bankrupt your household and you’d never be able to retire. And if you haven’t yet set up an IRA, do that today.
SAgirl 23
Separate bank accounts, yesterday.