Today, I spent the night with my guy, who I hadn't seen in ages. In the middle of sex, he answered his phone, told me to be quiet, talked to the girl on the other end about how boring his day was, then left the room to finish talking to her. When he came back, he asked if I felt like swallowing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was video chatting my boyfriend. As we were talking, he answered a phone call. I sat there the whole time as he planned a date with some other girl over the phone. FML
Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML
Today, while having sex with the guy I have seen for about 3 years, he answered the phone. I found out that he had a girlfriend while he was inside me. FML
Today, the guy I have been seeing stopped me in the middle of sex and told me to finish him off by going down on him instead. After a few minutes, I looked up to discover that the noises I had thought were moans of pleasure were actually the sounds of him snoring. FML
Today, when my boyfriend came over he was on his phone. We spent about 15 minutes together before having sex, then he made a phone call and said he had to leave. I could hear him from my window apologising to his coworker because he “just had to do something real quick but was now free to talk again.” FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep during phone sex. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML
Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML
Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML
Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML
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Top comments
mrose57 0
You should have said "sure!", then brought him to the brink, stopped, got up, grabbed his phone, threw it in the toilet and walked out.
arielhoee 9
You should've told him to swallow it himself. (:
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Comments (94)
HxCereal 0
yeah, your name says it all. get a new guy and a sex tips book and maybe you can keep this one in check.
invisiblerabbit 0
so did you swallow? if not, then i hope that he donkey punches you the next time you beg him to **** you.
illy88 0
this seems a bit fishy..why cant u say boyfriend rather then saying "my guy?". makes u look like a ****..also wht guy would stop in the middle of sex? weird..either u suck or he wasn't into it..sry sunshine
illy88 0
why can't u say my boyfriend rather then "my guy?". makes u sound like a ****..also, wht guy would stop in the middle of sex? either u suck or he wasn't into it...sry sunshine
Devyn333 16
same thing happened to me. my boyfriend answered the phone and told me to "SHHHHH" and talked to her about how much he missed her and made plans to hang out all while inside of me. then tried to finish
leahree 23
Hmm ... I wonder why xD
perdix 31
Am I just stupid or did she hold his load of **** in her mouth during his whole phone conversation?
measishouldbe 17
No, he hadn't finished yet and asked for her to blow him instead of finishing inside her
Bloodknight 22
No Perdix, your just stupid. This got favorited instantly! Bwahaha!
perdix 31
So, then explain to me what happened, Professor. After the phone call, was he asking her what she was going to do with the product of a future *******? It's really never make a difference to me. Once it has left my body, they can do whatever they want with it.
chloe2114 4
she hadn't given him the ******* when he got the phone call. :)
Mx_Rider 6
***** these days sigh
j8t 0
and?
anonacs 0
That guy is great