Today, I was in the garden of my new house when a neighbour came over and told me to clear off or she would call the owner to tell them they were being burgled. When I told her I was the owner, she said I was clearly unsuitable to be living on this street, and to stop lying before she called the police. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my neighbor. When she saw me cutting down trees on my lot, she interrogated me and called the police because she didn't believe I owned the property. She didn't call the cops when she watched someone steal a cord of wood from my property two days ago. FML
Today, my neighbor - whose first words to me when I moved onto the block were "I don't like your face" - called the cops and claimed I'd been exposing myself in public. His lowlife buddy backed him up on his lie. I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up in deep trouble thanks to them. FML
Today, my new neighbour is delusional. She’s only lived next door 3 weeks and she’s called the police on me 11 times for “taking his bin out so he can look in my window”, “hanging out the washing so he can look in my window” and “barbecuing with his kids so he can look in my window.” Crazy bitch. FML
Today, some completely out of touch with reality woman told me I didn’t deserve my house I bought with my own money, because it’s a 4 bedroom yet I live alone, so I should give it to her unemployed ass and her 6 hungry children. She wouldn’t leave and stood in my garden fake crying for 4 hours. FML
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
Today, I had to deal with my crazy new neighbour who tried to physically stop me from laying my new driveway, on my property, because she claimed she’s allergic to cement while it’s still wet. Even if that were true, piss off back to your house away from the wet cement then. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
Today, I moved into my first house and realised pretty quick that my estate agent lied to me about how great this neighbourhood was. I was in the house for 30 minutes when I heard the neighbours having a screaming domestic in their garden, then a brick flew over the fence and broke my eye socket. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML
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Top comments
Ambrily 27
Well, then let them call the cops and see what they have to say when they find out they were called without a reason.
Phil 14
I'm sorry that this happened to you. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that this was in the United States, and that you're of the "wrong" race in the witches(that's witch with a B)opinion. Unfortunately under the current administration those people(and I'm using that word loosely), feel like they have permission to act like that.
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Comments (7)
Ambrily 27
Well, then let them call the cops and see what they have to say when they find out they were called without a reason.
EmDizzle2007 28
here's a new game; when on mobile, try to read the fml BEFORE the and loads in.
timinator5000 28
Here's a game, proof read before you post something that has nothing to do with the fml
Phil 14
I'm sorry that this happened to you. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that this was in the United States, and that you're of the "wrong" race in the witches(that's witch with a B)opinion. Unfortunately under the current administration those people(and I'm using that word loosely), feel like they have permission to act like that.
skippydoda 32
I'd say let her call the cops. But you'd end getting shot.
slym12312425 9
Tell her to call the police and go inside, get all of the documents that show you are the legal owner/lawful occupant of the residence, and once everything is cleared with the police, ask that she be arrested for trespassing and criminal harrassment.