Today, I woke up to the sound of my psycho ex trying to break down my apartment door. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my psycho ex showed up at my doorstep to beg me to take her back, so I pulled my gun on her. I just found out she's pressing charges. FML
Today, my psycho ex got into my wedding ceremony and attacked my wife. FML
Today, my boyfriend starting going off on me, calling me a psycho, all because I opened our bedroom door while he was in there. FML
Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7 a.m. FML
Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML
Today, I found out someone, most likely my psycho ex, has been posing as me on local interest websites, trolling a load of people, and giving them my address so they can come fight me. I found this out when a gentleman showed up at my house wanting to beat me shitless. FML
Today, my now ex-boyfriend called the cops on me and told them I wasn’t letting him in the house. His keys were in the door, he was just too drunk to unlock it. FML
Today, my now ex was angrily moving out of our place. She slammed the door so hard behind her it bounced back wide open instead of latching. I don’t live in the best of neighborhoods. Since I was out of town, all I could do was watch helplessly on the Ring camera as my place was emptied out. FML
Today, my psycho ex-girlfriend showed up at my new job to, "Keep an eye on me." The same ex-girlfriend who has been stalking me since we broke up. Two years ago. FML
Today, my abusive ex-husband thought it was a good idea to buy the house next door and start living there immediately. Looks like I gotta move. FML
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Top comments
thedell3030 21
I hope you called the police and everything worked out, OP!
carl_carl_ 28
Get a restraining order!!
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Comments (56)
SalsaVerdeDonut 22
I really want to know why she was trying to break down your door. What was her endgame?
countryb_cth 38
She/he was out of flour and desperately needed some for the New Years Eve party. Without the cookies it would be ruined. OP wasn't answering their calls or door so it was only logical for them to break in. Flour makes people do crazy shit.
SecundusSecunda 27
This would be the perfect opportunity to role-play some LOTR or GOT siege! It would also be the perfect opportunity to send a psycho to jail. Happy new year, OP, and all the FML community!
snowkittyyy 18
Are you okay? :o
beeferjay 34
starting the new year off right!
Crazion 26
Call the police.
jlfish360 4
Thats scary.
jlfish360 4
scary!
sousaphonist 14
Call the police. Have him/her arrested. Hell, that's probably grounds for a restraining order.
jeffprobs 29
All ex's are bad, but some of them need a high five, to the face, with a brick, and set on fire
Garagedwella 26
Time for a restraining order!