Today, my boyfriend starting going off on me, calling me a psycho, all because I opened our bedroom door while he was in there. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me because I still close the door when I go to the bathroom. He pees and poops with the door wide open and expects me to do the same. FML
Today, my boyfriend trapped me in a corner of our apartment and kept making sounds that he knows cause me to become violently angry (I have misophonia). He wouldn't stop, even though I was practically begging him to, and now he's mad that I freaked out and broke his nose to get away from him. FML
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
Today, I found my boyfriend playing games when we have 5 million things to do, but the bastard picked me up, put me in the hall, shut the door in my face, and barricaded it with the sofa. I texted him, threatening to break up unless he opened the door; he texted back to leave my key behind when I left. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my psycho ex trying to break down my apartment door. FML
Today, my boyfriend came to my room and we were kissing. He was being exceptionally aggressive and intense when my brother knocked outside my door, demanding I open it. He had to jump out while I was fumbling to fix my top and cover my marks with my hair. FML
Today, I came home to find my boyfriend playing with himself. He got mad and said I "killed the mood". How? By coming home. FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML
Today, my boyfriend is blaming me for his recent diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. Apparently, I should have just kept on tolerating all of his explosive outbursts, instead of "forcing" him to start couples' therapy with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
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Top comments
Charlie Given 28
I think what you should be saying is you caught him doing something that you weren't supposed to so he freaked out 🤔
RichardPencil 32
Seems like we need some context over here. Did you burst into the bedroom and yell, "A-Ha!!!" That would have been cool -- and crazy. Or, might I say...unhinged.
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Comments (4)
Charlie Given 28
I think what you should be saying is you caught him doing something that you weren't supposed to so he freaked out 🤔
Brightside86 31
Close one, they almost didn't have time to hide the engagement ring.
RichardPencil 32
Seems like we need some context over here. Did you burst into the bedroom and yell, "A-Ha!!!" That would have been cool -- and crazy. Or, might I say...unhinged.