Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML
Today, I ordered a pizza online to be delivered to my apartment. After an hour of waiting, I called the pizza place to ask what the problem was. Apparently, the people at the apartment below me took my already paid for pizza and ate it. FML
Today, my roommate and I had to pay our first installment of rent. He's nowhere to be found. FML
Today, my roommate came home from work and yelled at me for my dinner being too spicy. The same dinner he denied stealing. FML
Today, I opened the door to a pizza delivery guy. I hadn't order any, but I thought maybe my roommate had. As he handed me the box, I said, "Thanks, you too" when he told me to enjoy my meal. He stopped, looked confused, and said, "Wait, what?" before leaving. I then realized my roommate was out of town and I’d just taken someone else’s pizza. FML
Today, I told my roommate she had to pay $55 to replace a piece of the oven she broke. She told me I was being selfish and decided to illegally break our lease because I was, "making her feel unsafe." Now I not only have to pay for the oven repair, I also have to pay her next two month's rent. FML
Today, I texted my flatmate to ask him when he would be paying his portion of the rent, since he has told me he would be late this month. He wrote back to inform me that he had moved out last night while I was away, and that he won't be paying me anything. FML
Today, my roommate and I received a non-payment notice from our landlord, over a dishonored check that was used to pay the rent. I give my roommate money for my share and she handles the checks. Apparently, her trip to Puerto Rico was more important than paying rent. FML
Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML
Today, my roommate played a crazy April Fool's joke on me by not paying his rent this month. Good one. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
trucker2 33
Remind him of the rent situation....and help yourself to another slice....
gunnerblaster 21
Kick his ass out and get another roommate.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (44)
anonymoususer070 17
As soon as you can(if you have to wait for the lease) I would start looking for another roommate and kick him out. For now just start buying all your own food and such and tell him until he pays you back for the rent he can figure out a way to buy all his own stuff. Also, grab the pizza and throw it out the window.
sophie0908 16
Tell him you don't like moochers either and that he has 24 hrs to pay you back or get the **** out. And have a slice a pizza since he owes you
fohfuucba 21
Literally illegal! In several ways!
chosha_fml 27
And what did he say when you pointed that out? Ungrateful user.
BananEnigma 24
Entitlement complex for sure.
deltax 8
Tell him its intrest on his loan
kangx1 28
Just because someone owes you money doesn't mean you're entitled to their belongings OP. How do you know that pizza wasn't going to be for more than one meal? He does sound selfish but hopefully it's because he's struggling and isn't normally like that
noreallywhat 17
Call it interest rates for the money he owes and that the longer he takes to pay you back the more shit you'll take
BloodyGlass 10
The next time rent is due, don't cover his ass and tell him to quit mooching off of you. :)
Anacanrock11 5
first, tell him to stop being so petty, then take the price of the pizza and divide it by slices, usually 8, then remind him he still owes you the rent money- 1x pizza slice