Today, as I was sitting on my terrace, I was wearing neither bright colors, nor any perfume, yet two bees seemed convinced that I must've been some type of flower and persistently tried to figure out where I was hiding my nectar. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the weather was nice so I decided to eat outside. I quickly found out that my new, expensive hair conditioner attracts bees. Lots of bees. FML
Today, I found out that my very expensive and beautiful smelling perfume attracts wasps. Whenever I go out, wherever I am, I am followed by multiple wasps. FML
Today, I was walking through a field with my boyfriend and he picked me some pretty flowers. I hugged him and leant in to sniff them. In doing so, I inhaled a bee up my nose and had to force it out my swollen nostril after it had stung me. FML
Today, I took a big sniff of a flower in my garden. I spent the rest of the morning blowing little bugs out of my nose. FML
Today, I was sitting in my garden and having a cup of tea while watching some dragonflies. I thought the dragonflies were really pretty, so I ran towards them and tried to catch their tails like I used to when I was a kid. They were exotic wasps. Ouch. FML
Today, my "friends" who know very well that I am terrified of bees forced me to face my fears, despite my protesting. As my "friends" watched and laughed while I tried to keep calm, a wasp showed up and scared me half to death, thereby angering the other bees. My face looked like a giant raspberry after the fact. FML
Today, I got up feeling refreshed and positive for the first time in ages, so I happily threw my window open to greet the beautiful morning. A bee flew into my eye. FML
Today, I thought I'd patched up the hole in my window pretty well. That is, until I heard a buzzing noise in my room. There was a huge ass bee that somehow got inside and was trying to escape. I would've helped, but I'm terrified of bees, and I'm now afraid to enter my room. FML
Today, I was sitting in the garden with a book, enjoying the fragrant summer breeze. That fragrance changed somewhat once my kittens discovered that the big mole hill next to me made an excellent toilet. FML
Today, I learned that bees like to get out of the hot sun, too. And that they do this by crawling into people's bed sheets. I also learned that these bees don't like it when you go to lay down in your own bed. They don't like it at all. Now it hurts to put weight on my right butt cheek. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
I know. Should I tell them?
Billsonhamsen 17
Yeah the little symbol next to the username. It's funny how people downvoted that. I really don't know what that means. Does that mean they disagree that the symbol looks chubby or does it mean they don't like chubby people what does it mean that they don't like referencing chubby people or does it mean that they don't like thinking that chubby be people exist or does it mean that they think that any reference to chubby people is somehow denigrating to chubby people?
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
I know. Should I tell them?
Billsonhamsen 17
On an unrelated note is anyone noticed how the new male and female icons look chubby now? Especially the female one.
Gubbon 17
icons?
Billsonhamsen 17
Yeah the little symbol next to the username. It's funny how people downvoted that. I really don't know what that means. Does that mean they disagree that the symbol looks chubby or does it mean they don't like chubby people what does it mean that they don't like referencing chubby people or does it mean that they don't like thinking that chubby be people exist or does it mean that they think that any reference to chubby people is somehow denigrating to chubby people?
dasin 18
i find showering(or not for a week) seems to make bugs hang around less, no real difference of color choices but most creatures that feed on dead bodies seem to naturally like me