Today, a thirty-something guy swaggered into my workplace. He was wearing shutter shades and torn jeans, and claimed to be our new boss. I called security to throw him out, at which point he produced his ID and let me know I'd be attending an employee review session next week. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met the new boss, who kicked the door open looking 15 years-old, with sunglasses on hiding his hangover, threw his bag on the desk knocking everything over, and greeted me with, “What the hell you doing in my office, bro?” This is going to be a complete disaster, I can feel it. FML
Today, I showed up to my new job early, hoping to impress my new boss. When he arrived, he walked by me and muttered, "Fucking tryhard." FML
Today, I went to my first day of work in over 2 years. As I approached the boss, he asked me what my name was. Turned out they hired the wrong person. FML
Today, we got a new manager in his 20’s who has never worked our industry before. His introductory speech included, “and you will respect me as your superior.” Our veterans have pranked him three times already and he blames me because mine is the only name he seems able to remember. FML
Today, our new boss showed up for his first day of work. I thought I'd seen it all, but he demands that we say "Hail to the King" every time he passes through the office. When I called HR about it, the guy on the other end told me to "man up and deal with it". FML
Today, I excitedly got ready for my first day at my new job. I arrived on time, dressed up, only to find out they meant next Monday, not today. My new boss just gave me a weird look and said, "See you next week?" FML
Today, I was starting my new job in the city. A man with a torn suit on came up to me and asks me for spare change. In a hurry to catch a taxi, I declined and rushed to catch one. At the office, my boss was late. About an hour later, I found out the man in the suit was my boss. He was attacked. FML
Today, I started my new job at a small business. I was pretty excited to finally be working, until I found out the big boss is a creeper and sees no problem making comments such as "You're way more interesting than the rest of these slope-eyed fucks." FML
Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
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Top comments
Vaporify 4
But I don't blame you, who can take him seriously if he's not professional?
Glitterhinoceros 14
People still wear shutter shades?
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Comments (148)
Vaporify 4
But I don't blame you, who can take him seriously if he's not professional?
HowAreYouToday 34
Apparently, the job interviewer must have "swag" as well.
astoryofroses 9
... note to self: plenty of weirdos out there. make sure to ask for ID before throwing anyone out
Delta2Almanac 7
I feel like all those making fun of "swag" memes are irrelevant in this case :/
srgsk9 9
Bring that up to his superiors. I'm sure there's somebody above him. They'll be glad to know their newest hire is making a class A jackass of himself. If he can't take interactions with his subordinates seriously, he won't take interactions with clients seriously.
epicskier 3
IT WAS A TEST!!! Hope u passed :)
epicskier 3
IT WAS A TEST!!!! Hope u passed :)
legitassassin_x 3
Me 2
noelykins1 19
The minute OP said swaggered I couldn't take OP or the boss seriously.
Pelvispresley 8
Don't judge a book by its cover...
Psych101 9
Employees, especially people in charge, are expected to dress appropriately, however. Also, I think he should have shown his ID immediately to back his claim.
weallfml 3
But what you see is what you get....
kakarot2 11
Technically we all judge books by their covers. We don't just go out there and randomly get books out of a shelve and begin to read. People are the same, and you should judge a book by it's cover. Other wise you wont last long. If someone came to be not looking professional to an interview I would not even see them. It's called common sense people. Sure I won't judge if you got your clothes at walmart vs a boutique in some high end place. As long as you show etiquette. Clearly the "boss" lacked it. I would of definitely asked for ID.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
What if the cover is torn? Like his jeans?
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
23- at a skate shop you can were whatever you want, when I worked at zummies they just said dress cool...but shutter shades :/
efrainelboricua 12
Maybe you should have asked for an ID before assuming first?
dominic1221 6
... He's wearing SHUTTER SHADES!! Pretty much only washed up celebrities or jobless douchebags wear those.
efrainelboricua 12
Only if you're being stereotypical. If anyone claims to be someone ask for ID don't try to get them kicked out just cause their appearance isn't appropriate.
the_anti_hipster 7
Seriously? The boss is supposed to be in a position of authority. If you want respect from your employees, respect them and yourself first by not showing up on your first day looking like a Jersey Shore reject. What did he expect?
ImaginaryFoe 1
Wow, #3 you are unpopular but at least you're right. Even if the man was joking, why would you immediately throw him out, OP? Say you work in an office. He likely had to go through some sort of security to get to you so at least check his credentials (CEO's son?). And if you work retail or customer service, why would security be your first move? And to all the people calling the man unprofessional, the "workplace" could be a sunglasses retailer, Halloween store, party store, or any number of places where that dress is appropriate. And even if it's Berkshire Hathaway, so what? His fashion choices are for *his* boss to critique. Maybe he got hired for his ability.
caesari 14
50- you obviously have no idea what you are talking about.
Goddess_Rummy 13
#50: I work at a sunglasses retailer and that kind of clothing would be inappropriate to show up in. Business professional only.
chellyX92 8
#3 really?? All jobs have a dress code even if you shovel shit for a living you have a dress code and you follow the dress code. The further up on the totem pole you are the more strict that dress code is. If you are a boss that gives reviews to the rest of the employees, under no circumstance should "shutter shades" ever be allowed to be worn and taken seriously. The boss deserved to have security called and frankly it doesn't matter who he is. If he doesn't look good the company doesn't look good. I hope you loose this mentality before you go out into the real world.
ImaginaryFoe 1
I've worked for a sunglasses retailer, too. People wore whatever they wanted. My last job (IT) didn't give a shit what people wore so long as they did their job. My current job has dress down days where pretty much anything goes. Sure, there's a dress code but it's frequently broken. As long as your parts are covered and your clothes are cleanish, do whatever. OP acted like a judgemental bitch (OMG shutter shades) and so are you all. You don't know every situation so you always cover your bases by thinking before you act.
I_lost_the_game 25
50- I'm going to assume that OP's work place ISN'T a Halloween store, or a party store, because I don't think that would be much of an FML
rsunshine2020 13
Don't judge a book by it's cover
Pelvispresley 8
Are you freaking kidding me?
rsunshine2020 13
Oops.. Sorry. You win lol
NoFeet 4
Chill out. She posted a minute after you. It's not like she had a grand scheme to copy your comment.
rsunshine2020 13
Lol I should get ready for a million dislikes.
ygdrassil 17
I'm judging your comment by "it's" grammar.
rsunshine2020 13
Crap. Its*
NoFeet 4
16- Not really. It happens all the time. You had the same idea and posted it a minute after and everyone says "OMGZ U N00B Y U GOTA B SO SUPID?11! SOM1 ALREADY SED DAT!1!!" I really don't get it.
Boomshadow 3
Or, in some cases, don't judge a cover by its book.
humorizer 14
Obviously you folks aren't that well versed in memes (not saying this in a condescending way; it's just an observation). See, the profile pic of the guy is the "are you freaking kidding me?" meme. Assuming he didn't change his profile pic just for this one comment, it was the PERFECT moment for him to write that comment. It's actually rather funny.
ASD_K 11
OMGZ U N00BZ Y U GOTA B SO SUPID?!11? SUM1 ALREDDY SED DAT!!1111!!!!!!!!1! Just kidding.
fuzz97 23
55, please don't tell me you actually care that much about bland, generic "memes"
legitassassin_x 3
Separate note: your cute(: Kik me?(username on profile)
Glitterhinoceros 14
People still wear shutter shades?
nchov523 11
Sorry, creeped on your bio. SID THE KID COULD KICK OVI'S ASS ANYDAY
BigBoyBounce 5
Hell nahh kid ovechkin's the best in the NHL and could take sidney anyday.
thgiL 9
I feel like sid is just a giant cry baby, but I gotta give it to Malkin he's a beast.
Hockeyboy4280 18
Ovechkin could hand Criesby his ass any day.
P374RD3D 9
4 replies and not one of them relates to the original comment
minisquid 9
WHY YES PEOPLE DO WEAR SHUTTER SHADES. Topic restored. Proceed as you will
rainbowkissies 14
... it depends on what your job is..
pokefan813 16
In What job would shutter shades be acceptable?
OhDearBetrayal 25
17- Zummies?
NoFeet 4
17 - Studying the arts of outdated douchebag style?
zandalee 20
Bay watch?
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
#17 being a douche bag cop? (not saying cops are douche bags, but there are douche bag cops out there who do as they please)
lms1997 3
I see that MCR shirt in your little profile pic there... You cool, you cool.
hatesfate 6
17 - the kind of place where he could have bought the company? That's my best guess
numbersystem 4
Shutter shade factory?
Welshite 40
Your new boss needs to attend an employee review session for himself.
reallytho3 11
He needs a magazine from THIS year lol
NoFeet 4
Nice move. I bet you really impressed him with that.
zandalee 20
Honestly. Who wears shutter shades these days? And torn jeans? Sounds like an 80's throwback like George Michael... But still, you should never judge a book by its cover.
TBelle4Ever 15
Or that talentless hack Kanye West with his shutter shades! Just to let people know, I don't care how many thumb downs I get. You have no reason to be mad. That is just my opinion. You may like him but I don't.
NoFeet 4
44 - I agree. How can anyone like Kanye West? He's such an idiot.
zandalee 20
- He doesn't have much talent. Not even good looking... He is good at swaggering though!
chowE_fml 4
Lol doenst matter if you like him or not his bank accounts could give less of a ****. Personally I'd say he's extremely talented which is probably why he has so much money.
Trisha_aus 15
Justin bieber has a lot of money too..he must be EXTREMELY talented. Give me a ******* break.
BradTheBrony 19
Kanye west is a gay fish. Case closed, end of discussion.
Tragichero92 12
I love that South Park reference.
DocBastard 40
I hope you enjoy your new job scrubbing the toilets. Seriously, you deserve whatever punishment you get for acting like a presumptuous ass.
DocBastard 40
Doesn't matter. The guy walks in and says "I'm your new boss"? I'd certainly ask for some verification first instead of assuming the worst and calling security.
efrainelboricua 12
I agree with doc. I don't think he deserves a thumbs down or me. We're just saying the truth. OP shouldn't have assumed due to stereotypes.
Psych101 9
28- I feel like OP shouldn't have to ask for verification. I think the boss should have shown his ID immediately instead, especially when he was dressed so inappropriately. Granted, OP still should have asked for ID, but his boss shouldn't have put him in that position. Also, I don't think calling OP a presumptuous ass is correct. Upon seeing the boss, I think most people would presume he was lying too. Perhaps calling security before inquiring further is too much, but the presumption is still there.
DocBastard 40
Psych - He DID assume this guy was lying, and he called security to have him kicked out! How is that NOT being a presumptive ass?
Psych101 9
45- I do agree that calling security was too far, but I still think it was a natural assumption to make. OP just shouldn't have acted on it.
iceroyalty1984 14
While I've been in school I've temped rather frequently and I can say from experience that some of the BEST companies I've worked for had really loose dress codes. If this guy is going to dress like that, the workplace might be in for a big change -- and it could be for the better!
dalilpanther 5
Shutter shades are never better.
TheDrifter 24
Also, a lot of new bosses will do something odd the first day. Outrageous outfits, asking random questions as soon as they see someone etc. It gets people to react instinctively and lets them know more about their crew's personalities.
sophie22_fml 8
Hey how come 34 got thumbs down when he said something similar to what Doc said and Doc gets thumbs up? Is it because he's more popular? ;{ anyway I agree with both of them.
thgiL 9
Lol 4 or so other people says op deserves it, all of them get thumbs down, doc says it and he gets mad thumbs up... I feel like the fml community has a very large infatuation for doc, not that I have anything against him. Just my observations.
sniperkit 10
I agree, 88. This was the first time I've thumbed down Doc, but I just have a different opinion than he does this time and a few other people do, too. But since he's so popular people go "Hey, I guess he DOES have a point..", even when they used to disagree wholeheartedly.