Today, I wanted to either say, "I already did it, sweetheart" or "I already did it, baby" to my SO, but my brain had other plans. I started to say ,“I already did it, sweet baby” but I got to "sweet" and in a millisecond mentally switched words, so what I ended up saying was, "I already did it sweet peepee." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML
Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML
Today, I had a brain fart moment while asking out a cute guy. I meant to say, "When are you going to let me take you out for coffee?” but what actually came out of my mouth was, “When are you going to let me do you?” He turned bright red and I ran away, and I’m too scared to go back. FML
Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML
Today, I accidentally called my Dad “Babe” on the phone. FML
Today, I wanted to look clever during a work meeting, so I used a thesaurus to find a fancy word for “important.” I ended up calling a project "pivotal" but mispronounced it as "pee-votal" in front of everyone. FML
Today, I was talking to an attractive guy, but I was so nervous that I got tongue-tied and then blurted out, "Stupid autocorrect." FML
Today, I accidentally called my cute boss "Babe." I now have to pretend it's what I call everyone, and start calling all my coworkers "Babe." FML
Today, I said to a girl that I recently started dating, ‘I like you so far’. My phone had other plans and decide to autocorrect far to fat as I hit send. FML.
Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe." FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Watch out for those Freudian slips... you could fall in a puddle of piss.
Hannah Knight 5
This isnt an anecdote.
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Comments (2)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Watch out for those Freudian slips... you could fall in a puddle of piss.
Hannah Knight 5
This isnt an anecdote.