Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran to catch the subway, slipped, and my pants ripped across the back. I got on the train trying to cover the hole, only to realize the train was packed with people staring straight at my underwear though my fingers. To make it worse, my phone started playing loud music and I froze as I considered which situation to fix first. FML
Today, I was on the subway, when the girl opposite me suddenly started shouting and accusing me of photographing her. I was reading a book on my phone, and I showed her the screen, but I got shoved around anyway by another guy, who threatened to report me for being a pervert. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus and as I'm quite short my legs were dangling. Some guy, who wasn't looking where he was going, tripped over my foot and went flying. He and everyone else on the bus glared at me like it was deliberate. The man next to me even changed seats in disgust. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, as I was trying to get off a crowded train, some asshole pushed past me hard enough to nearly knock me over. My bag hit a preschool kid standing behind me, and I missed my stop trying to apologize to him. His mom yelled at me all the way to the next stop. FML
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
Today, I was quietly reading in the subway, when all of a sudden, at a station, the man sitting next to me stood up, slapped me, yelled "Bitch!", and rushed off the train. FML
Today, I accidentally spilled water on my pants, and my crotch got soaked. To make things worse, I was in class at the time, and I had to walk home afterward. On top of that, I had to pass through a mall, and there were so many people staring at me the whole way. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, while on the bus, I had to stand as all the seats were taken. I was standing behind a group of small girls who were messing around with their bags. As they were swinging them, one hit me square in the nuts with her elbow. The girl said, “Wise up, I hardly touched you.” I missed my stop. FML
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Top comments
scorpiogirl666 0
Haha, you should've acted like you knew her. Been like "But, Mary, you always used to let me touch your ass!!"
mf_fml 0
but then if that makes you a pervert, does it make me a **** for letting shit like that pass when i used to take the bus? hahaha. c'mon, lady, it's public transportation! you're in for a long ride, everything's an accident. don't make such a big deal out of it.
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Comments (62)
LoveMeTURBO 0
shut up #3
ower 0
Lame, why did you just go oops, and explain what happend. Hardly FML worthy.
kellster 2
Why were you smacking your trousers so vigorously if the train was that crowded? Also, where on your trousers was there dust for you to have hit someone in the ass? YOUR ass? That's really weird. If this was genuinely a mistake, that sucks, but maybe try keeping your flailing limbs closer to your own body in the future. And yeah, I totally would have gotten off and just caught the next train! They come pretty often...
planetearth 0
Should have said "don't flatter yourself"...
michiee 0
it isn't your fault.
chobbest 0
"Trousers" lmao!!!=D hahahahahhahahhahahahhahahhahhah who says "trousers" these days? wtf
Synthetic42 0
I believe that this was an accident, shit like this happens all the time. When I get bumped on the T, I give the benefit of the doubt and I don't take it personally. Some people are just too sensitive. As a joke, after she said "pervert" you should have responded "That's how I roll"
SortaBlack 0
Tell the bitch to have a smaller ass
Lou_Briccant 0
Tell her you were reminiscing about the '50s when things like this were perfectly fine.
0 3
Did you say anything to her? Maybe like "sorry!" when you realized what you did? FYL for sure because it was an accident, but you shouldn't let her call you a perv if you're not one.