Today, I was going through my mom's old yearbook. There was a page long note from her friend talking about my mother's crazy drunk sex stories and describing multiple sexual encounters she had while on a pool table. I am deeply scarred forever. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, I woke up and had a flick through my camera photos. To my disgust my mother had taken pictures of herself, drunk out of her mind, naked with goggles on in our hot tub. FML
Today, my mum got drunk at a party and flashed me and my friends. FML
Today, my drunk mom informed me that out of all my potential brothers and sisters she’s swallowed over the years she’s "glad" I’m the one she "accidentally drooled onto her crotch, swam up her fanny and invaded" her "virgin egg." This kind of shit is why I moved out at 16 and still have a therapist. FML
Today, my mom cleaned my room, while doing so she found a very detailed sex book I got from an ex boyfriend as a "gift". For years I had her convinced I was still a virgin, until today. FML
Today, as I opened my diary to write a new entry, I noticed that every page had little side notes about what I had written. It had an extra long note on the page where I wrote about losing my virginity in great detail. All of the notes ended with "Love, Mom." FML
Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML
Today, my siblings and I were going through our old home movies after our mom recently passed away. We accidentally found a VHS sex tape of our mom and dad in their 20's. We are now collectively psychologically scarred, and can never unsee what we have seen. FML
Today, I discovered my mother went into the local pub where I work part time, got very drunk, and flashed her boobs at everyone. I found out when a picture was posted on Facebook. FML
Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML
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Top comments
shakethat 10
ydi for actually continuing to read the whole page. sicko
zattele 3
well instead of waisting your energy on being "scarred for life" get out there and make your own crazy sex history, just make sure no one writes, tweet, facebook, et al about it! so in the future your kids won't be in your situation. oh and just be glad if you were not conceived that night, if yes then FYL!
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Comments (88)
lefeverh3 0
that would suck!! I'm sorry.. just scar her for life;) haha
GuitarNukka520 5
someone knows how to get down.
brightnite 0
Well sorry you had to find out your dad was a pool cue. FYL
unidentified_sta 5
Go on now OP... No need to stop when it is just getting good...
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
ahh the 60's...that was where it was at
untoward 0
OP obviously wanted to know those things cause he or she could have simply stopped reading the page.
folfg7 0
I agree 31, not fml, YDI! retard close the damn book!
mamamiaaa_fml 12
9-hahaha. yeah. hmm. too bad there's no video of that.
AT_be 0
does your mom has a cell? can you please forward her details ;)?
528Alice491 3
WHY would you keep reading?! How do you know if there was more than one story?! I could never get that far.. Once I knew it was about my mothers sexcapades, I'd slam that shit shut, not keep reading... Js
xxsmilee4xx 0
ewwww!
starile 20
Since OP enjoyed reading the entire page without stopping, I say he take it up a notch. Bring the yearbook to your mom and ask her to regale you with tales, straight from the horse's mouth! Let us know how that goes.
sweetcheeksjvl 0
hmmm it sounds like she did ****....I think u and ur mom are gonna have a long talk.
shakethat 10
ydi for actually continuing to read the whole page. sicko
DeesFMLs 0
thts exactly what i was thinking..
VoodooGypsy 2
ditto
stephyyy12 0
haha That's What I Was Thinking About !
vabeach94 0
um, stuff like that you just continue to read..
ubetrwatchBN 5
Now you know why all your friends like to hang out with you so much when she's home...lol
DtownBrown 0
hahaha dirty
memo619 0
ask her to teach you some moves
ilikegummybears 0
lol yea
zattele 3
well instead of waisting your energy on being "scarred for life" get out there and make your own crazy sex history, just make sure no one writes, tweet, facebook, et al about it! so in the future your kids won't be in your situation. oh and just be glad if you were not conceived that night, if yes then FYL!
zecaptain91 0
YDI for snooping, but still FYL! No one wants those images.
ubatama 0
You are literally son of a b****.
gc327072 31
>post is from Idaho >shedaho >mfw
Doortje 30
So you were conceived on a pool table?
KCThaEclipse33 0
Damn...I Feel your Pain...