Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML
Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML
Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML
Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML
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Top comments
xLIGHTS_fml 23
That's why you should know what the tattoo means first!
Kidkaplan 19
You should also get a 4-leaf clover for food luck
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Comments (106)
Keevarou 17
At least you tried something new, but you should have made sure before getting a tattoo anyway.. And the good news is that you can most likely get it removed with laser or something (expensive)
chanellgymnast 17
So much for putting "a lot of thought into it". Fail.
perdix 31
#14, maybe the OP was aspiring to be a female sex slave. I've heard the job security is good -- you never will get laid off, just laid on ;)
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Perdix- that's kind of terrible to say, even as a joke :(
perdix 31
#82, no, it's perfectly fine as a joke. It would be terrible if I were serious. Lighten up, Francis.
fksfsdhfsdfh 26
Ydi for not doing enough research on something as big as a tatoo.
EvilUndead 9
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well, tattoo can be removed, I think. Next time use body paint or temporary tattoos. They'll cost more to maintain, but they aren't permanent.
5t3ff1k4h 45
It's not the same, and removal is expensive and painful as hell.
AllieCat21 21
A coverup might be a better way to go
EvilUndead 9
91, Of course it is expensive and painful. But if you want to get rid of it, what else can you do?
5t3ff1k4h 45
Please read 98's comment.
jmcgee17 20
I think I speak for the general public when we say we'd like to see your four leaf clover :)
RedPillSucks 33
Have fun explaining what the tattoo means to your future kids.
noelasis94 18
I wouldn't be to upset its fun to have things that have alternate meanings tattooed in you now you can have a topic of conversation on hand plus you can play a game with everyone called guess the alternate meaning that will be fun
unknown_user5566 27
It's all fun and games until someone guesses it correctly, and wants OP to physically demonstrate the meaning of the tattoo.
TheDrifter 24
Still sounds like fun and games afterwards to me.
lwm 4
"Correctly" in this case is what the OP wants it to mean. It's their tattoo. The symbol has been around a lot longer than modern kinksters have claimed it. Really, it's fine. If someone makes suggestive comments, or asks, you can tell them, "I've heard that, but I got it for it's alternate (or "original" - why not make stuff up, too?) meaning of XYZ."
perdix 31
I wonder what the "I've got a job for you" face looks like. I'm guessing there was a cousin or uncle or two making that face ;)
lainzilla 14
That's gross.
perdix 31
#38, maybe so, but do you think it didn't happen?
Jacksparrow72 21
You should have researched the meaning of the tattoo first.
ciaraohagan94 5
I just want to know how a knot can translate to female sex slave
EvilUndead 9
I just want to know what this knot looks like.
LColt 7
because in that culture, different knots mean different things. theres a knot for warriors and a knot for marriage and love.. and a bunch of other stuff. look it up sometime.
OnlyAvailableID 28
So there's a knot for tying the knot?