Anonymous
Nice imagery, dude
Today, I ate something that didn’t agree with me. Now I’m in the bathroom and my butthole is dry heaving. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Canton, United States
Better safe than soggy
Today, after thinking I was done with my diarrhea because my last fart was a dry one, I let loose with what was gonna be a good fart. It wasn’t. FML
Anonymous
Very irritable bowel syndrome
Today my wife made something from ultra salty fish she bought, and it was horrible. It set off my sensitive bowels within minutes. Now 15 hours later I’ve just had my first dry fart. FML
Meagan Ortiz
Wardrobe change please
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Anonymous
Today, after finishing a bottle and a half of pure cranberry juice to flush my bladder for a possible infection, I've been spewing liquid shits all day, my asshole burns, and it hurts to sit. FML
I stink
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Sostupid
Canada
Today, I had a panic attack because I was constipated. FML
Anonymous
Self-own
Today, out of nowhere, I started violently choking on my own saliva and shat myself in the process. FML
Rayvyn
United States
Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Ah, you have Spasmodic Anus, which is also the name of a great 80s punk band.
Chazzster 32
Always remember - It burns every bit as much coming out as going into your body. Also how spicy a food you will eat is not an indicator of your masculinity. In fact, being peer pressured or dared into doing something that you really don’t want to do just shows you are weak, not strong.
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Comments (2)
RichardPencil 32
Ah, you have Spasmodic Anus, which is also the name of a great 80s punk band.
Chazzster 32
Always remember - It burns every bit as much coming out as going into your body. Also how spicy a food you will eat is not an indicator of your masculinity. In fact, being peer pressured or dared into doing something that you really don’t want to do just shows you are weak, not strong.