Today, I was going running. It was an especially windy day and things were flying through the wind. Apparently, bodily fluid can also fly through the wind. Turns out, a women was barfing over a bridge and the wind caught it and it flew through the air. Right into my face and body. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, some woman, sick with god knows what, didn’t vomit into the bin next to my car, or even just onto the floor, she lurched over to my car and vomited through my open window onto my shirt and legs, and down into the footwell. I can still smell it. FML
Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML
Today, it's so windy, I actually fell over and nearly flew into the street the moment I walked outside. FML
Today, I vomited so hard into the toilet that the water splashed back into my face. I instinctually moved away only to finish puking on the floor. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML
Today, I coughed so much I threw up, then whilst recovering from throwing up, a fly flew into my mouth and I ate it. I then promptly threw up again. FML
Today, on my airplane ride home, the woman next to me wasn't feeling too well. She pulled out the air sickness bag to throw up into and missed. Her vomit splattered all over the seat in front of her and all over me. We were both covered in puke. And that was only my first of two flights. FML
Today, I was on the bus going to formal for my sorority. I was sitting in the 5th row of the bus when I felt raindrops on my face coming through the open window. I then realized it wasn't raining, but the girl in the 1st row was throwing up out her window and it was coming back in through my window. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling well at work. While I was in the bathroom losing my lunch, a very large piece of food came up. The resulting splash of toilet water went straight up into my mouth. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
goldthiosulfate 0
who clicked "you deserved that one"? it's clearly FYL.
Jaxro 6
Oh man that's gross. I would have went and talked to her and been like WTF.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (93)
QiScorpion 0
ewww that's gross! hope you're all cleaned up now...
maddierox13 0
#5- they shouldn't have learned a lesson. beacuse there is nothing to learn. dont blame them for being 'healthy and running'. people do it, and maybe you should get up and try it.
ammali 0
Oh my gosh... how disgusting! I think I would have puked too! (And the wind was still blowing, and it would hit someone else, and the cycle would continue, and it would be a chain of ex-stomach-contents galore)
Jimboom 12
#13 You obviously don't get it when people are being facetious. Do you really think I would seriously say you deserve to be puked on for trying to get fit? If so then you underestimate people a lot don't you?
ziggabot 0
hahahaha it's funny how you diss running and half your about me thing is about cookies and brownies XD
itsTiffany 0
The worst part? Your mouth was probably open too.
thekreeperkeeper 0
awww dude. truly, fyl. that stomach turning.
Jcsati8 0
am i the only one that notices "a women"?
Alexis9194 3
that's the first thing I noticed! haha.
DankJemo 0
Oh wow, you got puked on by proxy... that sucks hard.
red_wings 0
oh man that really sucks I would be in the shower for the rest of the day
greenman_fml 0
ooooh that's hot. i hope you're a girl; i've always had a vomit fetish. well time for a cold shower