Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my roommate spits the mouthwash back into the bottle after he gargles. FML
Today, I woke up at a stranger's house after a long night of drinking. Before leaving, I decided to steal some mouthwash so I didn't smell like a liquor store. Thinking of the night before, I instinctively downed the Listerine like a shot and puked everywhere. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get to work and decided to multitask by making my coffee while brushing my teeth. Halfway through, I absentmindedly poured mouthwash into my coffee mug and took a big gulp. I spent the rest of the morning trying to get the taste of minty coffee out of my mouth. FML
Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML
Today, I was rushing to get to work on time and grabbed what I thought was my coffee mug. It wasn't until I was in the car that I realized I had grabbed my husband's urinalysis cup. Not quite the morning boost I was expecting. FML
Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty. In my groggy state, I grabbed the first bottle of liquid I could find, opened it, and took a sip. It was nail polish remover. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
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Top comments
robertd73 24
why did your roomate leave it on your nightstand?
MagicMushrooms 0
That's bad however there could have been far worse things in that cup.
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Comments (62)
ElectricGhost_fml 5
Ewww!!!! That's disgusting!!! XO
ElectricGhost_fml 5
Ewwww!!!! That's disgusting!!!!
Iknoweverything 29
Why is your roommate leaving mouthwash on YOUR nightstand? Assuming you live in the exact room, wouldn't you at least have a different nightstand?
rattusrattus 19
... In the sink? FFS, people, you SPIT. IN. THE. SINK.
sallen0046 4
Why are you going around drinking out of cups that don't belong to you in the first place? It might have been morning, but you should be able to remember that you didn't put a cup of water on the night stand. And why is your roommate leaving cups of anything on your nightstand?
Kukua 5
In Canada, we never use the term "housemate". it's always roommate, and it means you share a house or apartment, and rarely a room.
Kukua 5
This was in response to 28 but got posted in the wrong spot as usual.
stewpididiot 11
and your roomie always uses mouthwash after giving random guys head, right ??
persimmon 0
why was it in your bedroom? this is really weird.
momony_fml 0
on your nightstand ?? Give us the whole story !!!
steelbubble 0
Mmmmm I found an open candy bar in the street, should I eat it? Dumbass