Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my roommate spits the mouthwash back into the bottle after he gargles. FML
Today, I woke up at a stranger's house after a long night of drinking. Before leaving, I decided to steal some mouthwash so I didn't smell like a liquor store. Thinking of the night before, I instinctively downed the Listerine like a shot and puked everywhere. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get to work and decided to multitask by making my coffee while brushing my teeth. Halfway through, I absentmindedly poured mouthwash into my coffee mug and took a big gulp. I spent the rest of the morning trying to get the taste of minty coffee out of my mouth. FML
Today, after a big house party the night before, I woke up with a dry mouth and a pounding hangover. I took a swig from a cup I'd left on my bedside table the night before, thinking it was water. Nope; it was vodka. FML
Today, I was rushing to get to work on time and grabbed what I thought was my coffee mug. It wasn't until I was in the car that I realized I had grabbed my husband's urinalysis cup. Not quite the morning boost I was expecting. FML
Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night because I was thirsty. In my groggy state, I grabbed the first bottle of liquid I could find, opened it, and took a sip. It was nail polish remover. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
robertd73 24
why did your roomate leave it on your nightstand?
MagicMushrooms 0
That's bad however there could have been far worse things in that cup.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (62)
gabinel1 0
Say your gonna get him a glass of water and **** in it.
robertd73 24
why did your roomate leave it on your nightstand?
cobras40 0
lol well the bacteria in ur mouth and throat are gone but u get his STDs
perdix 31
I've heard "Two Girls, One Cup" was one of the filthiest videos on Teh Interwebz, but I couldn't imagine it would be this disturbingly disgusting!
robc32ca 4
you didn't put the cup there... do you always take drinks out of cups left laying around?
darrelldrew 0
why is your roomys cup in your room?
Doortje 30
Why do you have such a slutty profile picture? It's sad, really. Also, "why is your roomies cup in your room?" You kind of answered your own question there, eh?
LoonyPheebs 0
First of all: You're mean. Secondly: Contrary to your beliefs, not all roommates share a one-room flat. College/university roommates do, but I think that darrelldrew thinks that the two people in this FML are sharing a flat with more than one room. Not a college dorm room.
heroesgleealias 0
haha I love how she removed the picture!
Doortje 30
First of all: I might be, but if you'd seen the picture you'd know that I was allowed to. Secondly: that would be called a housemate or a flatmate. It's pretty obvious that the people in this FML do indeed share a room.
LoonyPheebs 0
Still, speaking out about people in that way is just mean; or maybe I've just been raised to think making people feel bad isn't a good thing. if you wamt to voice your opinion, attempt to be nicer about it. Indeed, but roommate is generally accepted as a flatmate as well; ever watched FRIENDS? It is obvious that this is a dorm roommate, but not all peopme see what's right in front of them.
LoonyPheebs 0
*want. *people.
Doortje 30
It was a picture of her touching herself. I still think saying that it was slutty and sad was in order. But you're right, not all people see what's in front of them.
LoonyPheebs 0
Ah, in that case I see your point. That's utterly disgusting; you could've stopped at slutty, though. Although I admit that would've been both slutty and sad.
kev_213 0
why did your roommate use mouthwash by your bed? makes no sense
aback 5
********.
sweetonsno 1
If that's the case, this wouldn't be an FML, would it?
Soccergurl6 0
I agree... I would do the same
wtfsnickers 1
u share the bed too
TenderWhispers 0
sick