Today, I was cutting the grass when I saw a man staring at me from my neighbor's garage. This went on for 5 minutes until I finally yelled, "Hello?" There was no response, and I was creeped out, so I called my neighbor. It was a life-sized Paul McCartney cutout. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML
Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed, "Holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML
Today, a creep called me out in the street and asked me why I was in that part of that street, because he "knows " I live in another part of the street, and he found it "odd" that I was there. He was smiling all that time too. FML
Today, I was in the gas station and I saw this creepy lady staring at me and smiling. She just didn't stop. I even gave an awkward wave to let her know that I saw her staring at me. Finally I decided to confront the woman, turns out the overly happy woman was a cardboard cut out FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, while in Walmart, I noticed an old man who had been following me for about five minutes. I politely pulled over with my cart and smiled at him so he could pass. He then said with a creepy smile, "So, it's your turn to stare at my butt now?" It's the most attention I've gotten in weeks. FML
Today, as I passed by the window that looks out on to my front yard, I saw a man out there so I ran to the kitchen to call the police. The operator asked me to describe the man. It was then that I realized the mysterious man in my yard was the snowman I built yesterday. FML
Today, I went to check my mail but there was a guy standing at the mailbox. I said, "Hey, get the fuck away from there." It was the mailman. FML
Today, a lady told me I looked like Paul McCartney in his youth. With that little confidence boost, I told my girlfriend. I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that she didn't know who Paul McCartney is, or how she is now obsessively Googling pictures of him and is practically drooling. FML
Today, I saw my neighbor of twelve years at the grocery store. Being friendly, I went over to say hello. After I did, she responded by saying that she didn't know me but I look familiar. Finally, she remembered why I'm familiar saying that I look like the dorky guy from Two and a Half Men. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
Where can I get one of these?
imajinethat 0
YDI for not recognizing a Legend when you saw him.
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Comments (93)
quilly 0
How many FML's involve seeing a cardboard cut out of someone? This is shite. And lies.
Doogragoo 0
This....isn't an FML. You're just a retard
itak365 4
I just got reminded of Helter Skelter somehow...
noelmccartney 3
so, you get the picture right? it isn't a FML...BUT you owe us big time...so please, knock on your neighbor's door and ask him where did he get it. PLEASE.
LeeChavez 2
You know, the first person to post a FML about a cut out making them look like an a-hole, was probably true. But right after that, all these others start pouring in. It's a little suspicious.
beep_guacamole 0
lmfao this is so ******* funny!! xD
f0rg3t_m3_n0t 0
Eric Cartman: Oh sweet. The "Life-Sized Blow-up Antonio Banderas Love Doll." What a cool Christmas present.
Midgetron 0
that is pretty damn funny
technobutterfly 0
Holy ****! I want a life-size cutout of him! That's freakin' awesome!
xstaticdelta 6
You are really stupid for: A) not calling the police B) not going up to the neighbours house and doing some interrogation C) not getting a lifesize cut-out of a fat old grampa and putting one by your window to look back at that cutout