Today, I got my septum piercing stuck in a bag of cinnamon pine cones at Target. My boyfriend was wearing a red shirt with khaki pants, so all the other shoppers probably thought I'd had to call a Target employee over to "cut" me out of the bag. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working customer service at a large grocery store. I recently got a small, tasteful septum piercing that is barely visible. As I greeted a customer, she began to gag, held out her hand as though she was fending me off, and said, "I can't. Your nose ring makes me sick." FML
Today, I had a spur of the moment idea to go have my nose pierced. The piercer made sure to tell me how easily the little stud could get caught or hung up. I spent all day stressing over it only to scratch my nose and rip it out. Now I have a $40 bleeding hole in my nose. FML
Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML
Today, I was adjusting my nose piercing from the inside. My mother saw and thought I was picking my nose, so she slapped my hand away, tearing my nose ring out in the process. FML
Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML
Today, my blanket got caught on my nose ring and it took my boyfriend over an hour to get it free. Afterwards, he admitted he was trying not to laugh because it reminded him of a bullfight. FML
Today, at work, a customer told me how unprofessional my piercing made me look, and insisted that someone else wait on his table. It's not a piercing, it's a mole. FML
Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML
Today, my boyfriend got a job at a trendy clothing store in the mall. Trying to be supportive, I went to visit him and tried something on. I got stuck in the jeans and had to call my boyfriend, who sent the manager to pull the jeans off me. FML
Today, I went into Target's dressing rooms to try some pants on, leaving my full cart outside. An employee thought it had been left there, and took it to put the stuff back. My coat, hat, gloves were in it. I had to walk home. FML
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Top comments
TheEndIsNigh 10
Am I the only person who doesn't have a clue what this FML is about?
Fritterzz 13
Once again, you and I are kept apart, oh sweet scented pine cones. -Patrick Star
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Comments (14)
TheEndIsNigh 10
Am I the only person who doesn't have a clue what this FML is about?
Mynxie 26
I am lost too haha
IAmClay 24
Same
Glowworm56 27
Op apparently got her nose ring stuck in (or rather on) a bag of scented pine cones while shopping at Target. Her boyfriend went to help her, but since he was dressed exactly like a Target employee, spectators thought she had gotten a Target employee to help cut her free from the bag. Having an employee have to rescue you in public with everyone watching is pretty embarrassing--although in this case it was actually her boyfriend.
RichardPencil 32
Hopefully, he’ll get recognized for delivering excellent customer service! All they need to do is furnish him a name tag, and they’ve got an instant employee-of-the-month candidate.
Fritterzz 13
Once again, you and I are kept apart, oh sweet scented pine cones. -Patrick Star
Dave_Davington 34
This is why people tell you not to stick your nose where it doesn't belong.
DataWog 30
My first readthrough, I misread 'septum' as 'scrotum', and was VERY confused as to how one would manage to do that.
Lobby_Bee 18
What were you trying to in the first place?
Glowworm56 27
Well at least you caught your piercing on something that actually smelled good.
DragonMaiden7 15
I don’t know why, but my mind instantly interchanges septum with scrotum. So I had to reread this a few times before I finally understood what actually happened. Though, the first scenario was immensely more humorous.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Uh... how? You had to be that close to smell them? And, even if I get thumbed down for this, I'm going to say it - I'm sorry, but septum piercings aren't attractive, so you kind of deserve it there.
Kitiara521 24
What in the world were you trying to do, snort them? If you can't smell something like that without shoving them up your nose, it's not doing its job.