reddd
United States
Lonely
Today, I purposely wore a red shirt to Target just so people would talk to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Pauline
Cool
Today, I bought a new shirt I thought looked cool. At work, three people complimented me, then each one added a variation of, “My dad has the same one!” By lunch, my confidence had left the building entirely. A coworker even asked if I’d gotten it from the “retro section.” FML
hoaloha
Gilbert, United States
Today, I went to the store to buy some new shirts. I tried them on and none of them fit. When I walked out to return the shirts, everybody was staring at me. I looked down to see why. I'd forgotten to put my original shirt back on. FML
1nfected
Canada
Mean Girls
Today, when I arrived at work, I was greeted by my gorgeous coworker telling me my red shirt looked awesome on me. Before I could compliment her, she added that the color was fitting perfectly with my acne. I heard a couple of giggles around me. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
Atwater, United States
Shopper crash
Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML
Red Head Redemption
Certainly seems like it
Today, I dyed my hair red. Everyone I've met who knows my real hair color has accused me of being an attention seeker, or thinks I lost a bet. I just thought I would look more attractive if my hair was red. Is that a crime? FML
James
Anxious
Today, I began worrying I have social anxiety, all because while getting dressed I convinced myself that everyone would talk about me behind my back if I wore a striped shirt. FML
muffinmen1022
United States
Today, I went to Macy's to go shopping, I was wearing a shirt and tie and dressed nicely. Customers came up to me with questions, but I just ignored them. Minutes later, thinking I was an employee, the manager came and yelled at me, and threatened to fire me. FML
woopwoop
United States
Today, while standing in line at the grocery store, I noticed that myself and the woman in front of me were wearing the same shirt. As she was about to leave, I said to her "Hey! I'm wearing that shirt!" She turned to me and replied, "Not in THIS size you aren't." FML
helloitsbrian6969
United States
Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML
1234567898765432
Canada
Stuck on Amber
Today, I went to a Stoplight Party. Green shirt = single, yellow = hard to get, and red = taken. I showed up wearing a red shirt and saw my boyfriend in a green shirt. Thinking it was a mistake, I asked him jokingly why he wasn't wearing red. He looked at me oddly and said, "Oh, you didn't get my text?" FML
Top comments
HiIAmKevin 8
That's when you know you really have to hit up some bars...
Maybelline008 10
Well, did they?
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Comments (179)
Keevarou 17
Looks like you know how to get people to talk to you
Snafuusmc 12
Or a blue Collared shirt at best buy with khaki pants. It'll work.
Snafuusmc 12
Or a blue Collared shirt at best buy with khaki pants. It'll work.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
That will get you tackled by target employees.
Snafuusmc 12
Yeah that's my bad for the double post. I pressed send once though so idk...
omfgshiz 7
Your comment made my day.. Hahaha
dude1122332 9
Pineapple.
THE_A_TEEN 28
I LOVE THE RANDOM FRUIT GAME! Ok...i'll go next. Ummm.....Pomegranate.
The_Hitdude 12
Melons. Gotta love melons.
lotrgeek 10
Kumquat!
immaMonsta 8
Banana.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Tomato. Huzzah for confusion!
TheMathMajor 26
Cucumber Yay for more confusion!
Raath00 7
OP, that's kinda creepy. If you lack friends, try some form of social networking. Hell, if all else fails, family is an option
tony1891 22
that's a brilliant idea. next idea would be to either A. get a life. or B. put an application in for target.
anoellem 1
Try walking through Target wearing a giant banana costume or something... Then only awesome people will talk to you.
Nekogami 14
Why banana ? Why not strawberry? While we are at it .. We need a blender suit as well. Then we can make a smoothie. My thought process sometimes frightens even myself. But seriously. Clever guy. L
anoellem 1
He could do either. I was about to suggest that he bring friends dressed up as the strawberry and blender but then I remembered the whole point of this fml... He has none
Cappiej 18
Well, to be honest, I think that if you put on a strawberry suit, your face would be a little far off or the strawberry would look weird. And you can't sing that you're a banana either :o
anoellem 1
True lol
Nekogami 14
Yea. But the Hanes commercials are so amusing. Lol
ddeathbombb 5
Forever alone level:disguise
DocBastard 40
If you really want a stimulating conversation, just come here and post a comment about marijuana being harmful or about circumcision being mutilation. You're guaranteed at least 50 replies. You're welcome.
The_Hitdude 12
Don't do it Doc! They might be overwhelmed by the sheer number of stoners... That is a day that will live in infamy.
THE_A_TEEN 28
"Marijuana does more good than harm, alcohol and tobacco is much worse, it has medicinal benefits" "Circumcision mutilates penises"
Calyx_fml 22
I ground up my mutilated foreskin and put it in my bong.
esines 9
Marijuana can't kill you