Today, my friends and I saw a movie. We sat in the balcony. Halfway during the movie we heard a commotion, thinking it was a group of unruly teenagers like us, we began to pelt the lower half of the theater with candy. We later learned that it was a man having a heart attack. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML
Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML
Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML
Today, I, a man in his 40s, had to be taken to the hospital because I was laughing so hard at an old Disney movie that my diaphragm went into spasms. I stopped breathing and passed out for a few minutes, and my son had to call an ambulance. FML
Today, after a long and tiring day at work, I went to the movies, where I loaded up on soda, popcorn, and candy, and settled in to enjoy the movie. I ended up falling asleep and being woken up two hours later by an usher. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. He went to get popcorn and I went to the bathroom. Thinking he had got back before me, I sat down next to him in the theater. I leaned in to kiss him, then realized it was some 70-year-oldish woman. FML
Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML
Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML
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Top comments
Endymion_fml 0
Would YOU like to have to clean that up?
AWESOM_E 0
Why not be showered with candy when you get a heart attack? It's an awesome way to die
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Comments (153)
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
Having both worked in a theatre for all my teenage years AND had a family member suffer a heart attack - either way you guys are ******* jerks.
bears249 0
I'm so tired of seeing fake "FML's"
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
43, I'M so tired of seeing people whine about how FMLs are fake. Go to a "True Crime" website and mentally add an "FML" after every story if that's what you want.
CASoulNYCmind 0
Wow, unruly teenagers, that's one I haven't heard in a while, and I gotta go with the consensus on this one, joo are a horrendous human being. Kids these days!
bears249 0
44, What I meant was... I'm tired of seeing little kids think super hard of stories they think are funny. Then post it on here, hoping to God that it gets passed. Then they go around giving all their friends high-fives because they got an FML on this site. Yea, they're super cool. If you don't have a real FML to post, then just lurk the site, and enjoy yourself. No need to post lies.
bridawg 0
that didn't help the cause
NoirBlancCouture 0
Unruly teenagers... ugh, stupid teeny boppers.
bassmaster_pat 0
I hope you will have a heart attack soon too and die. You stupid imbecile!!!! never heard of anti social behavior? You are much more than that!!
itsTiffany 0
So now you feel like a dick AND you wasted all that great theater food.
bassmaster_pat 0
@ 27 what else do you expect?
thor82188 0
you ******* kids need to STFU during a movie before someone like me comes up and beats the shit out of all of you.