Today, I got my 11-year old son the NERF Elite 2.0 Shockwave RD-15 Blaster that he has been begging for as his birthday gift. Guess who the primary target is. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son turned 8. We watched as he unwrapped a $55 Nerf gun, extra 'bullets', new shoes and a school bag with his favorite TV character on the front and a action figure inside. As he finished he looked me straight in the eyes and says, "That's great ma, but seriously what'd you get me?". FML
Today, I was babysitting an eleven year-old boy. He decided we would play with Nerf guns with Velcro tips. I shot him in the crotch accidentally, and the dart stuck to his pants, and he wiggled it for about a full minute before his dad walked in to find us both staring at his son's crotch, giggling. FML
Today, I took my 8 year-old nephew to Laser Tag for his birthday party. I reluctantly was forced into playing one game. Apparently, no one explained the rules to one child, and instead of 'shooting' me with his laser pointer, he kicked me straight in the balls. FML
Today, my 14 year-old son asked to join my buddies and me at the gun range. The second I finished the safety lecture and handed him a pistol, he started twirling it on his finger (thankfully, it was unloaded). I smacked him in the head and took him home. Now he's moping and sulking like a bitch. FML
Today, I finally bought the toy my two year-old son always wanted. He would always tap on the TV when the commercial for it would appear. I gave him the gift, and he started playing with the bag it came in. FML
Today, I took my 15-year-old daughter to our local shooting range for her birthday, as she requested. While she was setting up a target in front of me, I jokingly pulled the trigger and shouted, "Think Fast!" not realizing that the safety was off. I shot my daughter in the arm on her birthday. FML
Today, after work I came home to find my sons trying to use my tampons as Nerf darts. FML
Today, I brought up the subject of marriage with my boyfriend. His response was to shoot me with a nerf gun and laugh. FML
Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML
Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
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Top comments
Bogrbon 27
Quite simply put, he should lose the toy gun. When I gave my kid a nerf gun, there were talks about safety both for real and fake guns. Part of that was “don’t shoot the dogs, don’t shoot anyone in the head, and don’t shoot anyone not willing participating in a battle, and don’t point the gun at anything you don’t plan to shoot.”
RichardPencil 32
Maybe when he begs for an AR-15 next time, you'll have the spine to say no. Now, I'm going to make my guesses: 1. Aaron Rodgers 2. Snooki 3. The Squid Games circle mask dudes. I hope I win! And please let the prize be a Shakeweight.
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
Maybe when he begs for an AR-15 next time, you'll have the spine to say no. Now, I'm going to make my guesses: 1. Aaron Rodgers 2. Snooki 3. The Squid Games circle mask dudes. I hope I win! And please let the prize be a Shakeweight.
Bogrbon 27
Quite simply put, he should lose the toy gun. When I gave my kid a nerf gun, there were talks about safety both for real and fake guns. Part of that was “don’t shoot the dogs, don’t shoot anyone in the head, and don’t shoot anyone not willing participating in a battle, and don’t point the gun at anything you don’t plan to shoot.”
RichardPencil 32
It's "don't point the gun at anything you don't plan to kill."
Taurus_ChicKa 37
You giveth the toy, you can taketh the toy away.