Robert Herrin
Kinky Crab
Today, I fell asleep with my hermit crab on my bed and woke up to him pinching my nipple. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
JoanT
"Nice alarm you've got there"
Today, I woke myself up by pinching my nipple between my elbow and the bed. This isn’t the first time. FML
patronuscat?
Meow!
Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML
Alwayspotato
Bittie
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend, he had his head on my chest and we both fell asleep. Suddenly, I woke up by my boyfriend biting my nipple, hard, in his sleep. I now need to go to the pharmacy because of a bleeding nipple. FML
scratchpost
United States
Today, my cat woke me up by sharpening his claws on my breast. FML
Fingerfqmycupcake
West Chicago, United States
Sharing space
Today, I woke up feeling crabby because of lack of sleep. I noticed what woke me up, it was man's best friend. He kept moving around and wouldn't stop rotating in circles to get comfy. I told him to lay down and he looked at me, did another circle and lowered down, butthole first on my forehead. FML
cdn_steed
United States
Today, at 5:30 in the morning while I was fast asleep, my cat decided the most threatening thing in my apartment that absolutely needed to be attacked was my left nipple. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML
Anonymous
Rise and shine
Today, my cat woke me up at 3 a.m. by jumping from the shelf and landing on my nutsack. FML
JackNicholsonInChinatown
Today, like most days, my cat tried to wake me up with a gentle, fluffy paw pat on my nose. This morning, however, he managed to get his claw caught inside my nostril. FML
piercednipple
Woodbridge, United States
Today, my docile gerbil was startled by a car alarm. He dove into my tank top and bit straight through my nipple. FML
Top comments
DMA 11
Still, it’s one of the better ways to wake up with crabs.
BurnInDemonFire 39
"Something tells me I'm into something good." - Herrin's Hermits
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Comments (11)
wanted_2_want 40
Was it part of the foreplay? You’re lucky it didn’t pinch something else. If you know what I mean.
Leah Davey 7
you have a pet crab?? that's awesome!! just remember to move him next time you get tired haha 😂
sarahfot 12
Great way to wake up 😂