Today, I performed a piano piece at a school play. Everything went well until I got up and accidentally smashed my shin against one of the piano legs. Before I could bite my tongue, I'd already yelled "Fucking hell!" in front of about 50 second graders. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML
Today, I was in a play and had a battle scene. I got a little too into it and wound up twisting my ankle. The audience was treated to me screaming like a little girl before face-planting the stage a moment later. FML
Today, I was stage-managing a school show. Some kids were goofing off backstage, so I yelled at them that they could hurt themselves. While walking back to my chair, I tripped over my own feet and fell 5 feet off the stage, shattering my cheekbone. FML
Today, I had a piano exam, for which I'd worked hard. I went in, and the examiner asked me to play some scales. I was so nervous, I played 3 octaves and then realised I'd ran out of space. I might have then said, "FUCK!" really loudly… and she heard. FML
Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML
Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
Today, I was at work as a musician, sitting on a piano bench. Suddenly, I found myself at eye-level with the piano, dumped on the floor by the broken bench, with my legs splayed out. I felt like I picked the wrong day to wear a skirt to work - but the audience members all disagreed. FML
Today, during a moment of silence in front of the entire high school during my band concert, I managed to hit the stand with my flute, and loudly scrambled to catch it before it fell over. I've never had so many people look at me. FML
Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML
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Top comments
tigerisabelle 31
You're just introducing them to the real world. a little early, perhaps, but hey. Give it 5 years and they'll all be cussing like sailors
lui_pg 21
That's a performance they won't forget
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Comments (50)
metazoanhaddock 11
At least you didn't knock your knockers.....
BillysBurgers 5
Well, at least OP was just doing it for second graders. Imagine if it was in a symposium....
afisxfallxchild 9
... How do you get up and smash your chin on a piano leg? Was your head two feet from the ground?
tarlax 11
A little advice: if something makes no sense, try reading it again a bit more carefully.
blobs94 12
Perhaps a shin- near your foot, eh m8
PuffPastry 8
Not chin, shin. It's part of your leg.
mattyiscool123 26
They've probably heard it before
Unlucky1232 20
what? have u seen modern children? In first grade my class mouths were worse than sailors
smoothies14 32
Maybe this is your wake up call to clean it up a little and make room for more creative language.
Brindilles 14
Please tell me there's a YouTube video of this somewhere
momac86 17
I bet they couldn't wait to tell their parents what they'd learned at school
heatherrr17 19
I bet u gave them a goood laugh lol