Today, I performed a piano piece at a school play. Everything went well until I got up and accidentally smashed my shin against one of the piano legs. Before I could bite my tongue, I'd already yelled "Fucking hell!" in front of about 50 second graders. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my first ever live piano performance. It went all great until the end, when I stood up, slipped, and smashed face-first into the keys. I've lost half a tooth and all my dignity. FML
Today, I was in a play and had a battle scene. I got a little too into it and wound up twisting my ankle. The audience was treated to me screaming like a little girl before face-planting the stage a moment later. FML
Today, I was stage-managing a school show. Some kids were goofing off backstage, so I yelled at them that they could hurt themselves. While walking back to my chair, I tripped over my own feet and fell 5 feet off the stage, shattering my cheekbone. FML
Today, I had a piano exam, for which I'd worked hard. I went in, and the examiner asked me to play some scales. I was so nervous, I played 3 octaves and then realised I'd ran out of space. I might have then said, "FUCK!" really loudly… and she heard. FML
Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML
Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
Today, I was at work as a musician, sitting on a piano bench. Suddenly, I found myself at eye-level with the piano, dumped on the floor by the broken bench, with my legs splayed out. I felt like I picked the wrong day to wear a skirt to work - but the audience members all disagreed. FML
Today, during a moment of silence in front of the entire high school during my band concert, I managed to hit the stand with my flute, and loudly scrambled to catch it before it fell over. I've never had so many people look at me. FML
Today, I was rehearsing for a school play. My drama teacher keeps criticising the part where I fake-trip, saying I make it look terribly fake. During today's rehearsal, I actually tripped for real, and smashed my kneecaps against the floor with a scream. He still said my "acting" sucked. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
tigerisabelle 31
You're just introducing them to the real world. a little early, perhaps, but hey. Give it 5 years and they'll all be cussing like sailors
lui_pg 21
That's a performance they won't forget
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (50)
IWillEatYouAlive 16
Just try and tell them that they say shouldn't say it
tarlax 11
These are kids. Telling them they shouldn't say it will only guarantee that they'll say it at every opportunity.
TMO2142 25
as one who has been told this. doesnt really work XD
OnlySkyrimStays 11
Could have been worse. Could have been, "Ah son of a cunting motherfucking, bollocks-licking, shit-kicking, dicksucking son of a bitch!"
lysx84 24
Sometimes "ouch" just isn't quite enough.
interesting33 37
At least then there would be too many words to fixate on and they might not have remembered it.
TMO2142 25
Are you Irish?(no offence) Usually Irish are the colorfully, creative swearers.
OnlySkyrimStays 11
Nope, I'm British. Not got a drop of Irish in me, though my ex came from an army family and he cursed like his father.
TMO2142 25
Ah
trumpet27 1
Yes. And then the teachers totally won't be pissed at you, that's for sure. (omfg. lmao)
caggybandicoot 34
Pretend it's one of those avant-garde pieces with random vocalisations in it? Seriously though, apologise until you're blue in the face.
luvlu444 24
That's what they go to school for, to be educated. You only taught them what they'll learn in a few years anyway
popularonion 33
I hope you followed it with an "oopsie-daisy!"
capnjacksparrow 7
I would say that you might have been okay since they might not have known what it meant, but these days im not so sure...
trumpet27 1
nice username
HitmanKillsYou 13
gg no re.
writerchic85 26
I'm sure most of them have heard bad language before. They probably swear with each other when there are no adults around.
trumpet27 1
ikr? Lmao
vikky538 29
There is nothing wrong with yellingout such pain!
atlien247 16
It's a hard knock life for OP!